My Mum

Im new to this site, i wanted to come on here as i have read some inspirational stories. We found out 5 weeks ago my mum has ovarian cancer. 5 weeks ago mum was fit and very healthy and then in the space of 5 weeks mum has had an hysterectomy and her omentum removed. She is due to start chemo real soon, however i think she will be to weak, she was eating when she came out of hospital but now shes not eating much and is so tired and has no energy. Im really worried now.
Its been so difficult to watch her go from a fit and healthy 58 year old to loosing nearlly 3 stone.
I just wish there was something i could do for her.

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Hang in there and continue to be a wonderful support for your mom. If she was healthy going into this, she will emerge strong again. This is the hardest time, recovering from that initial surgery and starting chemo. Her body has endured the worst assault ever and yet she is still alive. That's good! Do not fret too much about the weight loss as food has no taste for her. Once she recovers from the surgery, even while on chemo, you will begin to see her gain strength and weight. You will look back in four months and marvel at the progress she has made. I am glad you have come to this site as you will be supported here, as will your mom. So post your fears and joys, we will stand with you.

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MRSKelly12,

Yes, it is very hard to watch your mom who was seemingly well, but now isn't. She will get ebtter. It will take a while after the hysterectomy to start eating again. Help her to eat even when she doesn't want to. I would eat two mouthfuls about every two-three hours. It could take a month or two. Can she drink Enusre? Even milk shakes or frosties will help her. I ate a lot of popsicles for a while. Just keep being there for her and listening.

You are a wonderful daughter.

Eileen

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Thank you for your posts its a great feeling knowing there are others been through or going through the same, mum has tried ensures, but is only manageing half of one a day, she is due to start chemo on wednesday, however im worried that they might not let her have it if she is to weak - is this the case?

Once again thanks

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I'm so sorry your family has this weight to bear. Thank goodness you have each other. Your mom's story mirrors my own, and my children and husband have been my rock to cling to. Your mom's blood levels will be checked before chemo. I think it's really important to be as strong as possible to better withstand chemo. Encourage her to get mild exercise everyday. Even if she just walks a few hundred yards to start, she can gradually build up to more. The exercise will help with digestion and therefore appetite. It will also help her attitude. My sister walked with me everyday. I really needed someone to go along with me for safety and encouragement. Also several small meals a day probably work best. That's a diet routine that she'll likely want to continue during chemo. From my understanding, there's no reason to hurry into chemo after surgery. The cancer won't grow that fast. I was eager to get going with chemo b/c I wanted to FIGHT the beast. So I started chemo 4 weeks after surgery...the doc suggested 4-6 weeks. Everyone is different.

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Thank you for your reply pattysoo, mum has just been in bed or on the settee, i havent thought about asking her to exercise a little as she says she has no energy, but reading your post i would assume your right, she suffers terrible trapped wind not sure if this is due to the stoma or not.

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What your mom is going through is pretty well standard for ovarian cancer surgery recovery. What stage is her ovarian cancer? I agree with all the suggestions that have been made. I "graze" more than eat meals. Small amounts 0f food 5 or 6 times a day is better for her than trying to eat a meal. You usually have to worry more about gaining weight than loosing it so encourage her to eat or drink anything she wants. If you blend some ice cream with the Ensure it may taste better to her and will add calories. Like ET61, I ate a lot of popsicles. Some exercise every day will also help to keep blood counts better, which is important when she starts chemo. Start with just walking around in the house a few times a day, increasing the distance or number of times gradually. Weight and blood counts determine what strength of chemo she can get so she will be weighed and have blood work before each treatment.

Hang in there. It will get better. Your encouraging words and support will be a big part of her recovery. My prayers are with your mom, you and your family. Take care.

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try protein bars. it took me about three days to finish one . and the others said "grazing" miny meals though out the days excellent it really helped me to get my appetite back. I'm 54 and was in good health too at the time of dx.(walked about 12-15 miles per week} now I get a mile in 2 days but my energy is getting better.good luck your mom is stronger than what you may think.

hugs,

Kathy

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When she goes through chemotherapy, be sure to ask for effective anti-nausea drugs. If she is already losing weight, you want to be careful. Fortunately, there are quite a few medications that are very effective for nausea. Keep asking until you get something that works for your mom. Also, have her take them before she feels really bad. Nausea, like pain, is hard to manage once it's really bad.

Once your mom finds an anti-nausea drug that works for her, watch out for constipation. It is a common side-effect of pain medications and anti-nausea medications, too. LOTS of water, fiber and Miralax should do the trick.

Good luck to you and your mom! :)

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Oh how your story brings back memories.
I fortunately, did not have a lot of problems with lack of appetite. My main complaint was getting enough rest. I worked full time thru all 4 of my chemo cycles, and pushed myself to walk. Your mum may be experiencing some depression too. How is her stature? Be sure she TALKS about concerns and problems. I was placed on anti depressants for awhile. It really did help me get through chemo, and dealing with the reality of this disease. Sometimes we need just a little help.
It wont be a cake walk with this process, but you seem to be the kind of daughter I have, and will be there to help her. This is important too.
Good luck and keep us posted of your mums progress. This site has helped me greatly. Keep posting and reading.

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Hi Quilter, its difficult trying to get mum to talk, she has never been one for really sharing her feelings, i think she is a little depressed (gosh who wouldnt be) she has good days and bad days. I try and get through to her how important trying to walk is but she says she doesnt have the energy, even with help. I also encourage her to eat as much as possible but over the past few days she has only had a couple of eggs and mashed potatoe. She is going to hospital tomorrow to begin her first chemo session. 5 weeks ago mum was working 12 hour days, there is no way on this earth she could work now, you are so brave..

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