I often do not know where to post my discussions or journal entries. I do not know where to turn right now - I feel like I am on the brink of insanity and trying so hard to hold on.
I feel like I am on both sides of the fence. Or like I am on the outside looking in while also being on the inside looking out. I feel very cliche.
Facts: I had a heart attack in Dec. 2011 at age 56. Therefore I have heart disease. I must take my meds every day, eat healthy daily, exercise frequently, see my doctors regularly and reduce stress. Facts: I do not look sick and I am able to do a lot of things I was able before even though not everything. Facts: My husband has a lot of medical problems and several could be life threatening.
Because of all of the facts (including a VERY small support group) life can be overwhelming at times. Right now I feel like I am on the brink and I am just hanging on.
My husband is in a medical crisis right now. He is home but it is very lightly he will end up in the hospital very soon. Why isn't he there now? Because his four doctors are conferring. They are TRYING different methods to avoid his going in the hospital but we keep finding out that those methods are not necessarily going to work well, if at all. It is like when you are prescribed a med by the doc but the pharmacist is the one who gives you the most info. Something similar happened today and now we are very frustrated. One doctor was supposed to have called on Tuesday to schedule a test but so far no call. Not his health is getting worse and we are at the point that we (actually my hubby) may have to ask that he (my hubby) be admitted to the hospital.
Doctors and hospitals are such a sensitive subject with my hubby. He and I are both scared. I
I need to got - a family crisis.