Seems like my world is falling apart

My husband is doing well so far. 2'nd dose of chemo Wed of this upcoming week. He is starting to lose his hair. We joke about it. His mustache is falling out. His cough is better, thanks to you all. Mucinex DM, He if feeling pretty good. Some pain, but manageable.

I am worried every second of the day. I can't seem to put it out of my mind for a second.

It is just him and I, our daughter lives in Austin. She calls him and they will be up the week after Christmas.

Yesterday one of our beloved dogs went to the Rainbow Bridge. Everything is magnified, it took me over an hour to stop crying. A friend came over and buried him in our backyard. His name was Sam. My husband, bless his heart kept telling me it was okay, that Sam had a bad heart. (he did) it was bound to happen. He was almost 10 years old. I feel so sorry for his mate, Molly.

Thanks for being a place where you can vent. Where I only feel marginally silly for posting about my dog when you (we) have much more to worry about.

Our prayers are for good things for all of you.

Edited November 25, 2012 at 12:12 pm

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Valorie, what type of NSCLC does he have? What chemo is he getting? Where is his pain? I was dx in July 2010 and started targeted radiation in Sept. The day I went for my second tx, I had to come home and put my dog to rest. He became ill very quickly and went downhill fast. But he'd had kidney disease for 5 years and had done well until this point. I am single and he was my best friend. It was so hard to do especially since I thought he'd be with me through all of this. I see him everyday on my comp screen as he was my Buddy! Maybe you need to talk to a therapist about your own feelings about what's happening with everything in your life. You need to get support for yourself so as not to burn out and make yourself sick. I see he's gone fishing with his friend and had a good time. It's a journey and it's doable. We can only help so much and sometimes the hands-on support is what you need. Take care, Judy

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As usual, I agree with our Judy...You need to keep yourself well, take care of you too. I love my dog, he is right up there with family. Don't feel silly, Sam was part of your family, he is in doggie heaven lookin for a mailman! God Bless you and your family, NDM

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It is ok to grieve about your dog passing! They are part of the family. There are many hurdles and setbacks most people face, but it sounds like your plate is overflowing! I would suggest either speaking with a professional or a very close friend to unburden your heart and obtain a peace of mind! Everyone needs help and/or guidance every once in a while! Not everyone who is a caregiver, can be strong all the time ! Make sure you take care of yourself and remember it's okay to feel overwhelmed once in a while!

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Thanks for your replies, I feel much better today. My husband has stage 4 NSCLC squamous cell. His pain is in back of shoulder radiating down arm. We are off to see the onc this morning. Next chemo Wed. He is on taxol/carbo

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Will be praying for you Valorie!
Keep your faith!

Take care & God Bless!

-Joel

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