Another Bad Day

Well I have just had the worst day today. It's not just because my mother left either. For the last quite a few days I have been so tired that I can barely stay awake. My head also feels all fuzzy again and I thought I was over that, now its come back. Every bone and muscle in my body hurts. I try and get up and go upstairs with the boys but every time I try to I just retreat back into bed. I just don't have it in me. I can't wait to get off of the vanco. I keep telling myself that once I'm off of it I will start to feel better like my friend Omy. I just don't know how much more of this I can take! This is not living this is suffering and its not fair! I'm a good,caring, loving, helpful, giving person so why did this happen to me? All I need or want out of my life is to be with my family, have my gardens and do all of my crafts. I still have no idea how I got osteomyelitis in the first place! I don't do much except see my family and take care of the kids and our home. I didn't hurt myself. Its a mystery. The scary thing is is that this may come back at any time. How can I go through this again! Also my stomach and intestines are hurting again. I put anything in my stomach and I almost instantly get pains. I thought I was over this too. I had been doing so good too, eating good that I actually gained 9 pounds. I don't even want to step on the scale cuz if I lost even 1 pound it would be discouraging. Anyway maybe tomorrow will be better, I hope.