A True MRI story

I am going to be participating in a clinical trial for stable stage 3 NSCLC using the Stimuvax vaccine starting this Friday. In order to be able to participate, a brain MRI is required to be sure you don't have any metastases to the brain. I am VERY claustrophobic and was quite apprehensive about having a brain MRI. When I heard the next appt for a sedation MRI was going to be late Sept, I knew I either had to quit the clinical trial before even starting...or take some powerful oral med to knock me out. I got my prescription for the 2 10mg Valium tablets the day prior to the exam and had them sitting on the counter where I couldn't possibly forget them. I slept well Thur night and awakened Friday feeling well, but still concerned the Valium just might not be enough to get me through the test. That morning I came across a bookmark in the shape of a cross a friend had given me. I hadn't really remembered what it said, but for some reason, I picked it up and the words couldn't have been more appropriate. "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Philippians 4:13 All day long those words stayed in my heart and gave me some peace. I set the bookmark next to the pill bottle so I would be sure to take that with me too. My husband arrived home around 5:30 and we headed towards Chapel Hill for my 8PM appt with the MACHINE. We made a dinner stop at Cracker Barrel and I was able to eat well, no nervous tummy at all. I took one 10mg Valium at 7PM as instructed. We arrived at UNC around 7:30, check-in in the Women's Hospital went flawlessly and we were directed to the MRI. unit Again, a flawless check-in and I was told they would call me soon. By this time it was 7:40 and I was feeling a bit sleepy but not quite as much as I had hoped, so I took half of the second tablet, again as directed. 8:00 came and went and finally at 8:25, I was called to the desk by an MRI technician. He wanted to know if I had any paperwork with me and of course I said no. Then he wanted to know just what they were looking for since this was part of a clinical trial. I told him they just wanted to make sure I had not had any spread of the lung cancer to the brain. He then told me the test was on the schedule, but there was NO DOCTOR'S ORDER in the system. He said they would try to see if it had somehow been sent to a different dept but, not to worry, they would "get it worked out". By this time I could have gone to sleep except the movie "Anger Management " was LOUDLY playing on the TV. Even from the furthest point in the room, it was loud. Finally, at 9:20 the technician over to me and I got so excited thinking finally they were going to take me back and do the MRI. Then he told me "we're very close" but we have to call the doctor and get an order. They paged my doctor 3 times and he never answered. (What do they think residents are for, even I knew he probably was not on call on a Fri night) At that point, down the hatch went the last half of that second Valium, now 20 mg on board. Fortunately we had gotten a wheelchair in the lobby since I wouldn't have been able to walk very well by that time. About 15 minutes later he came out to the desk and up I rolled to see what kind of progress had been made. Declan the tech (we were on a first name basic by then and I was considering inviting him to dinner) said they had called the resident and she was supposed to have put in on the computer. It wasn't there....surprise, surprise, surprise. All this time I was clutching that cross for all I was worth and I have to say, I did not go crazy and start screaming or anything of that sort. While I was waiting there he called the resident back and asked her to "tube" the order to him. In the meantime he called the radiology nurse so she could come and access my port for the contrast material they needed for the MRI. At 10PM she arrived and they rolled me back to the prep room, still without an order in hand. After she accessed my port, they immediately took me to the room with where they do the MRI's and had me lie on the table. I realized just as soon as I lay down I didn't have my cross with me and I asked them if Ryan could get it out of the locker for me. Somehow in the process of the port access I had laid it down and he put it away with his book in the locker they let us use. When I got that cross back, I read the words one more time and then put in under my shirt right next to my heart. I asked for a blanket and a cloth to cover my eyes and I was ready to get it over with. They started the machine and in I went...and you know what, I lay perfectly still the entire 25 minutes of the test. The noise was deafening even with ear plugs, but I had this peace inside I just can't even explain. Now you may attribute it to 20 mg of Valium but I give all the credit to God. Why someone who was so fearful had to wait so long is a question I refuse to even try to explore, but what God can do for us, even in the midst of the storm, is truly incredible. By the way, I DO have a brain and I did sleep very well that night!!! I have NO IDEA if they actually had the order in hand when they did the scan, but I assure you, they will not hear any complaints from me if they did not!