239 lbs Down & Alot Left To Go!

I wasn't sure just where to post this so I just picked the most appropriate sounding category.
I am 46 years old, 5'5" tall and I have struggled with my weight since about the age of four.
Now, I can get a bit long winded when I get to talking about something so forgive me if I ramble. This is new to me and I have so much to say. I don't know exactly how far back to go with my story and I don't know how much you all can tolerate of me but, I'll just write and hope I make sense.
I guess I'll start with what got me to the exact situation I am in now.
My weight peaked at just over 700lbs but, I consider 698 to be where it all started. One night I had to go to the bathroom and when I tried to stand, I just could not do it. I was disoriented, confused and very weak. My Fiance', who had essentially become my care-giver, had finally convinced me that it was time to get medical attention. I had been going down hill a little at a time up to a point. Then suddenly, I started deteriorating very rapidly. My urine out-put was getting darker, as was my stool and, the amounts were dwindling until finally, I had stopped producing both.
I should tell you all that I was a drinker. I mean, a heavy drinker. I was consuming a 1.75 liter bottle of vodka a night. Now, I consider myself a pretty smart guy and I knew what I was doing would kill me sooner or later but, I was powerless to stop.
I had been maintaining a weight of around 450 for maybe four years. During those years, I did drink but, not to the excess that would become my near demise. It is in retrospect that I have come to realize that I was carrying alot of emotional baggage and I turned to the booze to cope. Slowly but surely I was needing more and more to get to the point of numbness that I was trying to achieve. As my alcohol intake increased, my weight began to increase as well. When I got to the point that eventually got to, I simply thought it was the vodka that had caused the weight gain and, what I would soon enough discover, complete renal failure.
My fiance' called 911 and, even though they were told that I was extremely over weight and to be prepared for a difficult transport, they still arrived totally unprepared for the task at hand!
There were three men and two women on the crew and they were at a loss. They ended up calling the county rescue team and they were able to get me loaded for transfer.
I arrived at the hospital knowing the seriousness of my situation but, I was not knowing just how grave my condition was.
The doctor on-call at our local E.R. did his best to examine me but, he could only do so much and, our local hospital is not equipped to handle someone like I was.
The doctor tried not to scare me but, I found out years later that he never expected to see me alive again. He had a catheter inserted to try and get some urine and he gave as thorough of an exam as he could. Something finally came out of the cath hose but it in no way resembled urine. It was thick and "muddy".
I was then transferred to a much larger hospital in Green Bay. I was in the most intense pain of my life, and everything seemed like it was moving in slow motion. I was a difficult patient to say the least. My veins were collapsed from dehydration, I was severely anemic, needing 8 units of blood. My potassium was in the basement too.
This is getting really long so,I'll try to shorten it as much as I can.
I was placed in the CCU. The doctor came in the room after hours of testing and examining me and he told Jill and I the news I guess I already knew but was not prepared to hear.
You are going to die! He told us to contact family and friends who we thought might want to say good-bye. I asked how long and he said by morning. Wow! Talk about a reality slap in the face!
We kept praying, I kept fighting and It is our belief that only God and Jesus could have been responsible for what happened but, slowly but surely, my functions began to work again. Oh, it was a longer process that what I make it sound, several days in fact, but I was told there was now hope.
It turned out that I had an infection called cellulitis and it turned into a much more serious infection and that was what caused the renal failure.
Once things got turned around, the weight started coming off quickly. I was so full of liquid!
I was in the hospital for 39 days and, by the time I was discharged, I was down to 560 lbs.
I went through alot of physical therapy to be able to stand again and, I had a long recovery at home but, I did get down to 405 lbs.
I am going to have surgery to remove a large panus,(hanging belly), which the surgeon estimates at about 100 lbs. After that I will be much more mobile and I will be back on the old diet and exercise road again.
Like I said, I am now 459lbs so, I did gain a little back. I will try to keep all posted as to my progress and hope to get support as well as give support to others.
Thanks for listening.

By catmacd
Posted November 6, 2009 at 8:28 am
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I'm so happy that you realized where you were headed and were you want to go! I believe that is the first and usually the hardest step. I joined this support group to be inspired (which you did) and hopefully to inspire others. I think as an online community, where everyone here is for the same goal, to be healthy, we can help one another by just being there and being supportive. For me, I'm just trying to eat healthy, mind the calories and try and get a little excersie fit in somewhere. I've lost 3.4 pounds so far this week, not a large amount but alot better than being 3.4 pounds heavier than I was! We can do it!

By Scooter63
Posted November 6, 2009 at 4:13 pm
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I am glad my words gave you a little inspiration. Deciding to start the sometimes long process of losing weight and trying live healthier is the first step and sometimes very hard to take. Once we decide it's time, it CAN be very difficult if you don't have support from somewhere. I think we can all be of help to one another when we have had a bad day or, even a good day!
I am happy to hear you have lost 3.4 pounds and proud of you for losing it. Like you said, 3.4 pounds is weight lost not gained. Every little bit is an achievement and no matter the amount lost, it is a step towards a healthier life.
I wish you all the best on your journey and hope to continue to hear how you are doing. Whether you have good news or if maybe you had a bad day and need to just talk to someone.
A good support system is so important.
Keep us posted!

By Scooter63
Posted November 6, 2009 at 4:46 pm
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I have been approved for my surgery and already have it scheduled! December 7th is the date! Merry Christmas to me. I am so excited. I was not expecting a surgery date so soon. I was given the impression from the surgeon I saw when I got my first opinion that due to the nature of the operation and all of the pre-surgery preparation that it would be a couple of months before they would be able to get me on the table.
I am so glad I chose to get a second opinion before committing to the surgery. Something just did not feel right about the first appointment at another facility. The doctor rubbed both myself and my Fiance' the wrong way. I mean, when you are in the exam room and the nurse is rolling her eyes while the doctor is speaking, what is one suppose to make of that? But, I have to admit that the more he spoke, the worse the feeling about the whole situation got. I know that you need to know everything about the positives as well as the negatives when you are having any surgery but, this doctor was all doom and gloom. It was all about the negative. He came across as a glass half empty kinda person.
Then he started on my Fiance' about her weight!
Just for the record, she is over-weight but, she is not morbidly obese and she is mostly a healthy person. We do not drink or smoke. We both did in the past but it has been several years since we have done either. He told her that she was an enabler or I wouldn't have gotten as big as I was. He had her in tears by the time we left!
My finding the facility I am having the surgery at and the team of doctors that will do the procedure was a bit of a fluke.
You see, I am covered by Medic-Aid which as some of you may know, has some pretty strict guide-lines and, many facilities do not accept it.
But, I looked in the Green Bay phone book and started with the "A's". I did some on-line research to go with my phone book search and found Aurora Baycare Medical Center. I called and, they accepted my insurance. Yahoo! So far, so good. I scheduled an appointment and, I was just blown away by the night and day difference from one place to the other. The doctor was very positive, looked me in the eye, shook my hand several times and didn't act like he was afraid to touch me. All of which the first doctor was just the opposite with.
I must also mention that the Hospital is absolutely gorgeous! It's like a luxury hotel!
So, if you ever feel uncomfortable with any aspect of a medical appointment or a doctor or just don't feel completely comfortable and confident about the situation, please do not be afraid to get a second opinion. You really do have to take your own health care into your own hands and be your own advocate!

By catmacd
Posted November 7, 2009 at 10:39 pm
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That is so true about taking your health care into your own hands! My husband had to have back surgery a year ago and the first doctor was just like the first doctor you had as well. The hospital was disgusting and we walked away saying to ourselves no way. We saw a neuro specialist thanks to the help from my sister in law who works at the hospital close to us and he was fabulous! The hospital was clean and the nurses were so helpful and understanding! The man my husband shared a room with also had surgery, but on his neck, performed by the same doctor. It make take a few tries but when it feels right you'll know you made the right decision!

By Scooter63
Posted November 10, 2009 at 11:29 am
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Thanks! At this point I am mostly okay with the impending surgery but, every once in a while I will be sitting here and it will suddenly hit me, "Oh, my God! My life is about to change so drastically. There is a fear beyond the normal fears you have when you are about to undergo a surgical procedure. There is also a fear that I am sure most in my situation fear. I have been over weight most of my life. I have been in my current condition for nearly five years. I do not remember life clearly as a mobile, independent person. What will it be like? Who and what will I become? Will it change my relationships? My Fiance' is used to being with the man she has had to care for throughout most of our relationship. Once I am healed and no longer have to depend on her, how will she react? I am not worried about the strength of our relationship, far from it. She is an incredible, loving, unselfish person and the love of my life. What I am worried about is the dynamic of "us".
I will now be able to do the things I like to do and I honestly think she will have a bit of a problem adjusting to my independence. Neither of us drink or have any interest in "going out". My idea of a good time is simply hopping in the car and taking a ride. I was also somewhat of an outdoors-man in my "former life". I like to camp,( roughing it style), no running water, electricity, etc.., fish, and plod around in the woods for hours. One thing I will no longer do is hunt. I will never be able to bring myself to kill another living creature again.
The photo you see next to my name is pretty close to what I actually look like now with one exception. I seem to have gotten somewhat saggier in the belly area and it hangs pretty loosely down to my ankles when I sit. Most of that will soon be gone.
I will actually be able to buy shirts off the rack at Walmart! When I try on shirts now, I am an 8X around the middle and a 2X around my shoulders and chest. It's really weird.
I will keep posting my thoughts and feelings and I will reply to anyone who would like me to. I plan on taking my laptop with me to the hospital so, as I feel well enough, I will keep everyone posted on my progress. December 7Th will be here so quickly. Okay.. so I just swallowed hard. Maybe I am more nervous than I thought? Oh well, I have Jilly, family friends, all of you and most importantly, my Faith in God!

By vbutterfly
Posted November 10, 2009 at 2:18 pm
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What is inspiring to me is that you are going through all this with such a positive outlook. I am so glad to see that you have a strong faith that will help you through these times. Sometimes that is the only thing that gets you through. I think some of us need to be reminded how blessed we are and not sweat the small stuff. Just get up, dust yourself off and keep on going! Thanks for sharing your story with us. I hope your surgery gives you the results you are looking for. The dynamics of your relationship with Jill may change, but it may be for the better. Just be sure to include her in your new journey for a better you and she will hopefully feel as good about it as you do. I'll be praying for you that your surgery goes well! Keep us informed.

By Scooter63
Posted November 10, 2009 at 10:33 pm
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Wow, you folks are amazing. I am very touched that complete strangers can be so kind. Just know that I appreciate each and every one of you and your words of kindness and encouragement. I showed Jill the responses I have been getting and she is just thrilled that I was able to find such a great support system.
Thank You!

By Scooter63
Posted November 11, 2009 at 6:48 pm
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I had my first bout with complete terror! I woke up in the middle of the night and, for no apparent reason I was scared to death! I know I had been dreaming but, it was gone as soon as my eyes opened. I think the dream must've triggered my feelings? I am on some heavy duty pain meds so, I thankfully fell back asleep quickly. Fentanyl and Oxycodone are two of them. Some days are more clear than others. I will not take anything during the day that would make me sleepy. I am the kind of person who likes to wake up and hit the day running! I like to enjoy the daylight, relax in the evening and go to bed at a reasonable hour.
My Doc says that when the time comes I will likely have a difficult time with with drawls. The Fentanyl is supposed to be as addictive as Heroin. That scares the crap outta me!
Gotta go now my friends. I'll be back!

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