So depressed

I am so depressed right now and cant seem to snap out of it. I am not suicidal, just so tearful and wanting to crawl under the covers. For those who don't know me, I had a TT last November, RAI in January and had a clean bill of health 6 months later. Of course that doesn't mean that I am completely well, but no active signs of cancer right now. I have been adjusting to my thyroid meds over the past months and am finally up to .125 mcgs of levothyroxine. I have labs due again the end of the week to see if there will be another increase in medication.

My diabetes has become much harder to regulate since the diagnosis of cancer, especially the last few months. That makes me feel bad, which doesn't help the depression. I am tired all the time and still cannot sleep well. Usually every 3-4 days, I am awake all night.

There is a referral in from my dr to see a psychiatrist and I am waiting for that appointment. My dr wont prescribe an antidepressant until I see the psychiatrist, because I am taking tramadol for osteoarthritis and the last time we tried an antidepressant, it reacted with the tramadol. Sometimes I think she is punishing me for taking the tramadol, but its the only thing I have found that gets rid of the pain without being a narcotic.

So, I hate not having a thyroid and having to take replacement medication that doesn't make me feel better. I hate being a diabetic and having the food I eat make me feel bad. I hate being alone, handling these things. I hate that its my birthday and I am another year older.

Please excuse my venting, but there is no one else that understands how helpless I feel when I feel bad. This group has been such a good support for me, from the time I was diagnosed with cancer and knew nothing about a thyroid, surgery options, medications etc. If you made it this far through my ramblings, thanks you for listening.

Carla

Report post

27 replies. Join the discussion

I'm sorry you are going through all this, and I know there is nothing I can say right now to make you feel better. But I am glad you are here, with people who care about you and understand how much all this just stinks. Feel free to vent all you need to.

Report post

Hi,

There has to be some sort of antidepressant u can take, or cant ur doc switch ur pain meds so that u can take an antidepressent. I know it sounds like u dont wanna take narcotics but i think ur mental health is really important and i feel like ur doc isnt taking it serious enough, and i would look for a different doc if u dont get what u want very soon. Try to focus on the possitive things in ur life, i know it may be really hard right now. keep ur head up and good luck

Report post

Happy Birthday! I've always told myself on my birthday, hmmm I don't think there is a year in the past that I would want to re-live! I am happy moving forward even if it means a few more aches and pains that mysteriously appear with each year! Lol.

Always remember, you aren't alone! You have a lot of friends here for you! I'm sorry that you are having to go through all of this, but maybe there is a silver lining out there for you somewhere sometime! Be patient, be strong and focus on the positives in your life!! Good friends, good weather, maybe get some beautiful flowers/plants, maybe have a good meal on occasion??? I know with all of the diabetic cookbooks out there, they have to contain a few scrumptious meals!!

Don't feel bad about venting, you can always vent here! We are here for you on good days and bad days!!

Report post

You have new friends here,,Happy Birthday! Start fresh and think positive

Report post

I have one word for you to think about-Menopause.
Sleepless nights, crying jags, mood swings, depression...
they are all symptoms of menopause.

Report post

First of all, happy Birthday. feel some of your pain. I have had leukemia for the past 14 years and now thyroid cancer. I understand the feeling of helplessness, especially when you feel that the meds just haven't been adjusted correctly. I don't know your whole situation, but if you have a hobby or read, maybe that would take your mind off of some of your medical situations. I think that possibly getting your blood sugars under control might be a good start, and other things will fall into place. If your endo isn't able to help you with your two endocrine problems, maybe a change in doctors might be a start. You van always e mail me if you need to "talk". scrappygirl123@me.com.

Report post

(((((hugs)))))

Report post

nothing to say other than hugs and happy birthday. we all certainly go through times of hopelessness.

Report post

Happy Birthday!! Take one day at a time. It is very overwhelming and depressing when you wonder if you will never feel better. Things can and will improve, try to look forward to the day you will feel good. Hang in there.

Report post

Happy Birthday Hugs....You have been through alot, give yourself a pat on the back...YOU ARE WONDERFUL!!

Report post

Carla, about that birthday... keep having those, it's a good sign! :)

I know about trying to keep arthritis, diabetes, and thyroid issues all going smoothly, but that gets to be a 30 hour day!! Relax and do your best on all that. Keep your spirits positive as much as you can!

Be Strong and Stay Positive!

Report post

Carla, happy, blessed birthday!

So you know what fillers are in the levothyroxin? Could it be anything that would cause your diabetes to act up? Do you have other health issues that could be contributing to the diabetes? There are tumors and nodules that are called neuroendocrine tumors (NETs) that cause diabetes and go undiagnosed and misdiagnosed.

Your thyca labs should include TSH, Free T4, Free T3, and (importantly) Thyroglobulin (Tg) and TgAb. Being sleepless is usually because the med does is too high. It will def. cause depression during the day. If it has to be that high, make sure your blood pressure and heart rate are decent. If thye are elevated the dr. can give you a beta blocker to counteract the effects of the levo.

You are not alone! Sleep when you need to. Pray, meditate, garden, walk...all will help.

Report post

Hugs!!! Happy Birthday!!!!

Report post

Happy Birthday Carla, you are never alone here. Stay with us. :)

Report post

Thank you everyone! I will take all your suggestions and thoughts!

Report post

Sending you Birthday wishes and letting you know you are neither alone nor alone with depression sypmtoms. I was put on anti depressants a year ago and gained another 14 lbs, thank you very much. After joining Thyca and learning much from everyone here, i told my Dr that I felt I needed an increase in meds or at least try to add Cytomel. She said. "Did you know that depression is a symptom as well?" Again,thank you very much, information that would have been useful last year, and why did she not think of that instead of antidepressants? I am not at all opposed to anti depressants, they are life saving. However, when you have both diabetes and thyroid issues, I think these should be explored in detail and perhaps getting your levels under control may help solve your outlook. I also agree that menopause contributes to the whole picture, if you are there. Get those levels checked as well. Our bodies are designed to have all these hormones in balance, and when they are not, it can affect our outlook on life. I have lost family members and dealt with my own health issues, and so had legitimate reasons to be be down, however, being in balance helps to cope. Hang in there, be an advocate for your own health, you are so worth it!

Report post

I would bet your T4 dose is not right yet. Make sure you let him know how you are feeling. You sound hypo to me.
Post your T4 here and get some feed back. Even if your hypo, some docs are maddeningly slow at increasing doses.
Sounds like yours may be one, from your comment that you are "finally" up to 125.mcg. I am at 187 now and feel great.
I would bet I am heavier than you are, but, you need a doc that listens to your symptoms as well as your numbers, and you sound so hypo to me. Its not helping your depression, and it could be the cause. Hope your new bloodwork tells you something.

Report post

(((((hugs)))))

Hope you get answers soon - I know how hard it is! My thyca diagnosis came exactly a year from breast cancer diagnosis! Keep pushing for help - it's out there.

Report post

Hugs! last Friday I had TT and waiting for patthology result. After biopsy I was told I had papillary cancer. I am trying to keep my" sunny side up", who knows what is in front of me. Having some faith helps too...

Report post

Hugs! I too have osteoarthritis, diabetes and Pap Thyroid Cancer. I too am very tired and discouraged that I can't get things done and keep up with my little home! I did find a walking group to help me get stronger. We walk a couple of times a week and use a graduated system to increase our times and it is making a difference. I sleep better most nights, and have a committment that gets me out of the house and focused on something positive. This is the new me. I don't know if it will ever get back to "normal" so I have to made this work somehow.

Report post

This discussion is closed to replies. We close all discussions after 90 days.

If there's something you'd like to discuss, click below to start a new discussion.

Things you can do

Support ThyCa

Help ThyCa: Thyroid Cancer Survivors' Association reach its goals and support people like yourself by making a donation today.

Donate to  ThyCa: Thyroid Cancer Survivors' Association

Discussion topics

Help and information from ThyCa

Community leaders