Travel after ablation...

• By janee
• Posted November 13, 2008 at 1:12 pm
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Heck yes, you should be nervous. I don't know how you handled yesterday!! Is he thinking right--my guess is that you need to do the thinking for him presently. And do not let him drive like I did with my husband a couple of months out. I knew things weren't right when we got stuck between a fast moving train and the guard rail behind us!! You need to stand up and take over--not easy with a husband if he is like mine and likes to be in charge. I am on your side!! Janee

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• By fabu
• Posted November 13, 2008 at 9:28 pm
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I would do the driving, because he hasn't driven since his sca. At least he knows what he can and cannot do (he is more afraid of driving than I am of him driving). Doctor's seem to think it would be ok, and he would be fine (no outside the country) and it would be on the way home.

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• By janee
• Posted November 14, 2008 at 6:34 pm
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If you are comfortable with it, then go ahead and take him. I just remember all the things that I did for my husband shortly after the trauma I had been thru watching and doing CPR, that it was me that needed the break. My husband seems to have no worries or concerns now--it is all left up to me and I am so sick of it! He is very child-like which hopefully is not the case with your husband. Please tho, just do what you are comfortable with. Good luck. Janee

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• By fabu
• Posted November 15, 2008 at 11:16 pm
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no he is childish and i make all decisions, iask him to write a check and pay a bill i find it under the car seat month later,,, he has memory problems, and he hates his family, so Im the one,he loves his cocktails so it makes it worse, cause then everything is a joke! ha ha
I wonder sometimes whether I shoulda saved him...?
its like he is trying 2 teach me a lesson for bringing him back and starting this whole ordeal! I now drive he cant but the drs refuse to support the ssi endeavor... this has been goin on a year and unemployment is running out as is his disability.
I have limited resources and am running short on patience, which i thought where unlimited from my experience with aids patients and blind companion

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• By janee
• Posted November 16, 2008 at 1:01 pm
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I am so sorry. I do really relate to how you feel. May I suggest that you go see an attorney immediately and see about getting guardianship of your husband. I know money is short, but you can go to a disability attorney who does not charge. I suggest you contact an attorney in your town and find out who does this.

You can then apply for social security disability on his behalf. Surely the doctor's will support you after this last experience!! The other way to go is thru a neuro-psychologist who can do testing. The results don't tell you so much about his personality but will tell you about perseveration, executive function, etc.

As far as your husband trying to get even with you, I am sure we all feel this way at times. Fortunately, it is not him but his brain doing this. Try to keep a sense of humor if you can, and get a close friend or your kids to help you thru this. If not a psychologist. It is so complicated!

And if you absolutely cannot handle, I see nothing wrong with getting a divorce!! You must take care of your self or you will become sick yourself. Your husband could be placed in a boarding home for men.
Maybe I am ahead of myself on this, but don't allow yourself to get sucked in to be an angry and sarcastic with your husband. It doesn't help anything.

Stay in touch. Janee

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