Hello, I am a 35 year old male, and had a heart attack last fall. It wasn't a horrible one, yet it was a heart attack. I attended the 12 week cardiac rehab program, quit smoking (cold turkey), and altered my eating habits greatly! Since the heart attack though, I have noticed some changes in my personality such as ; easily angered by minor issues, more particular about little nuances, I seem to worry more than I used to, and so on... and my wife says she notices a great difference in me as well. She also says she "has to walk on egg shells because she never knows what will bother me". I really don't like the fact that I have / am changing. Has any one else had similar experiences. I also recently started seeing a therapist, but that may take a while. Just wondering.
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afterwords...
- By jsalisbury
- Posted March 11, 2009 at 3:32 pm · 4 replies
- In Surviving SCA
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- By Greg2000
- Posted March 15, 2009 at 7:24 pm
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Fear is what is eating you up. I went through the same thing and it took me about 3 months to get over it. I had decieded that the little things were just part of life and that rather than be bothered by them take them as part of part and parcell.
If you look at it as though you are here and your not dead and you will probably be here tomorrow, what the hey. Get over it and start living. Be nice to the people around you and always try to say soemthing nice even to a stranger. Like the clerk in the gas station. Look at theri name tag and thank them by name for what ever little thing they did. You will feel
better when you see people start smiling when you recognize them.
I travel -a lot- and am not home with my sons an dduaghter and it kills me to be away from them. But I have no viable choice. SS won't accept me becuase even though I have an IDC\PM my engineering postion is considered sedentary. Right.... So the kids run and shout and make a mess. Why should that really bother me. It is all part of life.
A theripst may help you realize what you need to do, but its a lot more powerful, if you just get over it, hell you went cold turkey on smokes.
I decided that why be miserable and make those around me miserable. My tinker toy is only a stop gap before what will eventuallyh happen. So I have my coffee and I love my wife and my kids. And just becuase I have this damed thing in me doesnt mean I need to stop living.
Take the good with the bad, and just be thankful you were there to do that. It really isn't that bad.
- By jsalisbury
- Posted March 15, 2009 at 8:47 pm
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Thanks Greg! I agree 100%. Take care.
- By ckspring
- Posted March 16, 2009 at 3:18 pm
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You may be suffering from depression/anxiety. It is VERY common after SCA. I had SCA 4/06 due to blockages in two major arteries. I tried to go the counseling route, trying different counselors and everything else I could think of (exercising daily, time for myself, getting plenty of sleep, etc.) but still was irritable, sad, and felt like my mind was just not working the way it ought to. After more than 2 years I finally got the guts to discuss it with my primary care physician and he put me on Lexapro. Almost instantly I felt better. I was already on about 10 meds, so what was one more! And I can tell you my husband and kids (grown) are much happier to be around me. I know there is a stigma associated with taking anti-depressants and that really kept me from speaking out for a long time as I have always been know to the "strong," but your body has been through major trauma and it may be that the chemicals are so messed up that counseling just won't do it. No harm in trying counseling first, but don't wait too long to talk to your doctor if you don't feel the counseling is helping. Hope this is helpful.
- By willysr
- Posted March 26, 2009 at 1:56 pm
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The strength of this community, comes from each one of our personal experiences & the opportunity to pick & choose that which may help us. Unless I missed it, your story centered around a heart attack aftermath, and not about an ICD inplant??
I undoubtedly brought on a damaging H/A, from self abuse, at the age of 46.(alcohol & cigarettes), as many of my family & friends warned. It stirred extreme fear & anxiety within. So much so, that I attempted to drink it away. It caused me to dive deep inside of "Myself" and I reacted with the exact same behavior. I was destroying my wife & two children. FEAR is an almost guaranteed result of any heart problems. I've since had to go on a long and deliberate recovery plan. At 77 years of age, I have experienced a lot of resulting heart episodes since then and the FEARS never have disappeared completely, but I have found many ways to face, accept & deal with them. I feel that you're on the right path, by changing habits, and seeking counseling, just don't give up! Seek all the help you can muster up, you won't be able to chase these FEARS on your own. My greatest strength comes from "GOD" today. I test Him with my FEARS daily & at times, all day, when the situation calls for it! It works, it really works!
Greg, as been suggested by others, life is for real. We all have to learn (thru others,hopefully), to find rational ways to handle it.
This I have been taught, " A WISE MAN LEARNS FROM OTHERS MISTAKES, A FOOL LEARNS FROM HIS OWN!
You appear to be on a wiseman's path! Learn to put the focus on your loving wife. Best of life.
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