re: losing my mind

Talked to the NICU MD and he probably has a protein allergy, so after 3 days on antibiotics they will put in a PICC line for TPN and then start him on an Elemental formula. Saw they Psychiatrist yesterday who felt I was ok to go back to work in 3 weeks (even though i spent the entire session crying and telling him I can not function) I know my son will get better, Im just afraid I won't last long enough to see that. Im screaming for help from the doctors and none of them seem able to do anything other than give me and RX and say "you'll be better working" How am I going to work if I havent slept in 3 days? If my mind is racing and my chest tightens with anxiety all day? If it weren't for my husband prompting me to getup and do my ADL's I would probably be catatonic staring at the wall all day. Im not a lazy person, im not asking for long term disability, all I need is more time to process everything and let the meds work. I can see why people go "postal" you ask for help and are denied or are told to figure it out yourself (the MD said he didn't know how to get me disability and that as a nurse I should have known how the process works meanwhile he kept looking at the clock) I was initially placed on PDL d/t stress with work while pregnant and now im being told im ok and i should be at work. I feel defeated. Just suck it up, deal with it, move on.