Dear Feet:
As I involuntarily sit here at my wit's end, I am searching for some way to allay the constant discomfort that you bestow upon me. I do realize that my options are few and at this time I recognize that I am reaching. But, since nothing that I know of has any real chance of working, I will give this a try.
Ever since that fateful day 10-16-2006, you have made your presence felt through a myriad of sensations, none of which I was even remotely aware of prior to that day. I mean what's up with that? Do you take delight working in concert with the rest of the lower half of my body to make my life miserable? Now, don't you be concerned with other parts of my body, I am concerning myself with you, feet.
Maybe in the past you felt like you were being walked on. If that is the case, I guess I can't blame you and if an apology will help, ok I am sorry. Maybe, I did not show respect when I forced you into socks that had holes in them or smelled like feet. Yeah ok, I'll admit I did force you to wear at times perhaps stinky sneakers. Nah, I guess perhaps isn't really being honest, they were stinky. But they were comfortable. Didn't I always buy New Balance? Yeah, you know I did.
Didn't I make it a point to live in Florida so you would not get cold? You can't forget when it would get cold on occasion, I always kept you warm under the covers. This is addressed to you right foot. You remember that time when your plantar fascia was torn from running? I didn't make fun or laugh at you, did I!? Of course not, I am not that type of person. I took you right to the doctor.
Come on feet, it wasn't that bad. You remember how you used love to walk on the beach. That sure was a lot of fun. Yo feet, we had some pretty good moves out on the dance floor. I can't forget feet how funky you would get when I would play drums.
But feet, all those times are in the past. Today, as look down upon you, sitting swollen and essentially motionless on the floor emanating pain in a seemingly unending cycle, I can only beg. I am forced to submit to the reality that I will never be able to relive the past accept in my memories and my imagination. Is it too much to ask to let me do that without pain?
Respectfully submitted in a moment of sanity on behalf of myself and every other gimp,
Be strong




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