Parking Rant!

Yet again I was 'confronted' if you will, with a rude comment from some man I didn't know in a Parking lot. It seems he took it upon himself to be judge and jury in a situation he knew nothing about by commenting on my use of a Handicapped 'sticker' parking space.

This was the final straw. On his way past me he said loud enough for me to hear but under his breath... 'Another loser who doesn't need a handicap space taking spaces from someone who REALLY needs it'

I simply could NOT believe my ears! This was the second time someone said something like this to me!

The first time I was dumbfounded that someone would actually say something like that and I said nothing. I mean, I don't have hair and wear a baseball cap.. it's OBVIOUS I'm bald... do they think this woman would actually SHAVE her head just to get a closer parking space?

This time I was ready!

I walked up to the insensitive jerk and said politely...

'You just don't know why some people have to use a handicapped parking spot. Just because you can't see me limp doesn't mean I don't have a condition that makes it difficult for me to get around. I've been doing major chemotherapy for EIGHTEEN YEARS...

(mind you he's walking away from me and I'm following him *have rant will travel* LOL),

I have heart issues which makes it hard for me to breath while walking, I have broken both of my feet in the past year and it's difficult for me to keep my balance, not to mention I've had 10 major surgeries one was less than a month ago!!!!

(I took off my hat so he could see my fuzzy bald head with minimal downy duckling hair regrowth) and continued....

'Just because you can't SEE these things wrong with me doesn't mean they aren't difficult for me to deal with! It doesn't mean I don't deserve a closer parking spot! It doesn't mean I have to put up with RUDE comments from people that don't know what their talking about!'

He got in his car, closed the door and drove away.

GRRRRRRR!!!

I didn't growl at him.. but I am while I'm typing this~! LOL

This was handled with such finesse and tact that my step daughter (who was standing next to our vehicle) asked me what happened when I walked back to her. She hadn't heard any of it. I was so proud of myself for keeping control!
People need to know that there are MANY reasons others use handicapped parking spaces. Not all of them require a limp or wheel chair usage.

This guy needs to know that his rude comment upset me. Even if I knew he was wrong, it was upsetting.

I bet he doesn't comment on anyone else using a special parking space after his encounter with the Finally-Had-It-Almost-Bald-Woman that went ballistic on him!

By DianaS
Posted July 1, 2009 at 5:32 pm
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Good for you! You are so right and I'm so proud of you for standing up for yourself. It's true, people can't always look at you and tell what your health problems are.

By lovemnms
Posted July 1, 2009 at 5:52 pm
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I'm glad you spoke up! Good for you! People have no idea do they?
I am on disability but don't feel I need a disibility plate for now. For me, I'm currently able to get around, but if I need one I'm sure I'd hear a comment or two. Now I'll remember what you said and speak up if I'm ever in that situation.
Thanks for speaking on behalf of those of us who may not necessarily "show" a disability but still have one.

By Debofil
Posted July 1, 2009 at 6:51 pm
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Wow, I love what you did ! And you said it just right ! I would be so flabergasted if someone said that to me that I would just say uh uh . And then be mad at myself because I didn't say something ! ha ha. I sure hope that insensitive jerk learned his lesson. God Bless for all that you have been through.

By melf
Posted July 1, 2009 at 6:55 pm
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Good for you! May I say that you handled the situation beautifully.

Why not follow up with a letter to the editor of the local newspaper?

Melissa

By dwm26
Posted July 1, 2009 at 8:16 pm
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Unfortunately people do abuse the handicap spaces.
I know 2 one bought a car that had a sticker on it so he used the space. Another had back surgery needed it for awhile but kept using it long after he needed it.

By Dodie1
Posted July 1, 2009 at 8:45 pm
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Sorry he didn't pay any attention to what you said, but so glad you spoke up.
I get strange looks still since my hubby has to get me out of our van and put me in my wheelchair since I can't do any of this myself. It's really bad when the older people stare worse than the kids do.

Take care & God Bless

By Patricia123
Posted July 2, 2009 at 7:44 am
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Good for you,,I had a vicarious thrill to hear your rant.

I usually have trouble ranting and just say loudly "God is watching you all the time and He sees you and may help you have a heart"

But every fifteen years or so I get a good rant.

Your ranting skills are impressive!!!! Rant for all of us every time.

By FavoriteAunt
Posted July 2, 2009 at 8:08 am
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Don't worry - he may have walked away but he heard every word you said and it probably bothered him more than you think!

I've seen abuses with the parking too - one day a young girl just hopped out of an SUV she parked in a handicap space and she looked like she could run a marathon. She obviously used someone else's car and didn't care. Most people are good, but there are some out there.

I'll also remember what you said in case I ever hear anything like that. Also like that letter-to-the-editor idea.

By djwaz184
Posted July 2, 2009 at 9:22 am
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Way To GO!!!!!

I do remember a person or shall I say employee that ticked me off so much I went to the manager of the store.

At the time I was taking my mom shopping at Target. I patiently waited for a handicap spot because she could barely walk long enough to get to the motorized shopping cart inside the store. Mind you the woman had been through nearly 8 straight years of hard chemotherapy for breast cancer that was terminal.

As I waited, some kid, and I mean kid of say 16-17 took the spot that I was ready to turn in to. There was a handicap sticker hanging on the mirror. He parked, ran out of his vehicle in his Target uniform and into the store. But I got his name, Jamal. I was so upset. My mom, bless her heart just said, let's wait for the next one.

I parked in a "regular" spot and went in fuming mad, even shaking at this point. This was the last straw for me seeing someone do this. Even when I've had mom in the car and she chose to stay in the car, I always parked in the regular spots. I was thankful that I had the ability to walk and wasn't going to take up space for someone else that needed it.

Anyway, I went in and demanded that I speak with a store manager. When he came up, I was still shaking mad. I told the manager what had happened and he immediately called Jamal to the front of the store. The manager then told him that he should not park his car there. Jamal said that it was his grandma's car and that he was late for work that is why he parked there! What made me more mad, the manager didn't tell Jamal to move his car! I looked at the manager obviously MORE pissed off, I started to speak but the the manager stopped me and said that Jamal was on company time now and that he could move his car on his break. WHAT F*&^%% nerve this A&&hole manager had!

I went back to the car to let my mom know what happened and we didn't wait for the next spot, we left. I was not about to go inside and go shopping in a store where even the manager didn't care about the handicap parking spaces.

However, even after my own chemotherapy and awkward mobility, I am still thankful that I'm able to walk. I know there are worse off folks out there than me (I think of my mom), that need those close spots so that they can do their shopping like everyone else.

I've also seen spots desginated for "moms to be". I think that is a great idea. Pregnant woman, especially late stage, definately need to be closer too. Never know, their water might burst while shopping!

There is one store that even has a special close spot designated just for Veterans. What a nice recognition for their honored service to our country!

By kibbitzqueen
Posted July 2, 2009 at 2:52 pm
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djwaz184,

Wow. I'm so sorry that your momma had to deal with that on top of everything else she was dealing with. I know first hand what a dilemma it is to be the healthy one helping someone who needs an designated spot.

The looks you get from people are really horrible. I have been known to write the owner of the company when something like this has happened. The manager should have done SOMETHING even if it was make that employee clock out to move his vehicle THEN clock back in. I think I would have phoned the local police at that point too and found out what time Jamal got out of work. There ARE laws.

I usually asses my feelings for the day and try to get a little more exercise and if I'm doing ok (a few weeks out of chemo) leave the spots for others. I DO use them, don't get me wrong but if there is a spot 3 down from the special spaces, I'll walk the extra paces just to leave the room for those who feel like I do when I'm fresh out of chemo. Much farther than that and I'm too tuckered out go into the store!

I find it peculiar that so many are particular about the 'special' parking spaces and comment about their use but no one EVER has said a word about my use of the motorized cart!???? What's up with that?????????????????????

Perhaps because they wouldn't have a use for the motorized cart but they would use a closer parking space? The world may never know.

Your mom is really something with her 8 years of hard chemotherapy. It's not an easy road to journey down. I think the doctors feed things to you 'six months' at a time to make it easier to digest. 'Six months of Taxol and we'll see how your doing' to an unseasoned cancer patient means 'In six months I'll be done and this nightmare will be over'. To those of us that are 'seasoned' it means, we'll be doing something else after these six treatments'.

I think the Veterans spot is a wonderful idea! I don't think they are recognized enough for the service they provided our country!

In closing, I'm also sorry that you went through chemotherapy. I was in 'remission-ish' when my mom found out about her cancer. It's just not the kind of Mother-Daughter bonding ANY family needs.

Hope all goes well with your treatments and your Mom bless-her-heart.

Kibbie

By zircons
Posted July 2, 2009 at 3:39 pm
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I am sorry to say I disagree with most of you. Those handicap spots are supposed to be for cars that have the sticker or card. If you don't have one, how are people supposed to know you are handicapped? There are people on chemo who can walk from a parking space to the store or wherever. I know that many people abuse the privilege. I have often thought about hollering at people who use the spaces and don't have the handicap card, but I am little and they are bigger than I am.

By kibbitzqueen
Posted July 2, 2009 at 4:29 pm
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I DO have a 'Handicapped card' hanger for my window though from day to day it's my own decision whether I 'need' to use it or not.

If I'm feeling up to it, I don't. If I simply can't make it that day I do. My husband drives a truck for a living and is away. 99.9% of my family live 5 states away. If I'm on my own to get a prescription or gallon of milk and I don't feel well, I use the card!

By Shearaw
Posted July 2, 2009 at 8:02 pm
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Kibbie, great response. Unfortunately our society equates the sticker with people who look just like the icon cartoon. There are a lot of people out there who are lacking a filter between their brain and their lips!

Several months ago someone honked at me in the parking area of our cancer center, because I wasn't pulling out quickly enough to suit her. I was shocked at the insensitivity. I almost gave her the single fingered salute, but instead I just scowled in the rear view mirror. On second thought, if I had gotten out of the car and walked back to her vehicle to say something, maybe she would have imploded right then and there.

Welcome to Inspire!

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