I don't think there is even one of us who can say that cancer didn't change them. It changed how I think. It changed how I live. It changed how I love. If anything good can come out of cancer it is that. I never look at anything the same as I did "before." Cancer brought back some of my dearest friends I hadn't seen in years. I also made me some new friends. I really "take in" little moments that before I wouldn't have gave a second thought. I try to let "little things" slide that before might have caused me to lose my cool. Oh don't get me wrong, I still throw a little temper tantrum now and then. lol..... I have a 3 yr old granddaughter whose is precious to me . I try to make special memories for her because I'm afraid she may not remember me. I also hug my grown children more. I try not to argue with my husband as much (this is the hard one! hehe) I can't imagine roles reversed and me thinking I may lose him. I'm so glad that if someone had to get cancer, it was me instead of someone I love......I know this may sound odd but..........I think cancer made me a better person.
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How cancer changed me
- By katelynsmamaw
- Posted May 4, 2009 at 1:46 pm · 24 replies
- In Survivor stories
- Shared with the public
Explore topics in this discussion:
Cancer Heart failure Pain Diabetes Breast cancer Ovarian cancer
24 replies
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- By MOMOF2ANGELS
- Posted May 4, 2009 at 2:03 pm
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OH - SO TRUE !!
IT HAS ALSO CHANGED ME !
- By darlingclem
- Posted May 4, 2009 at 2:59 pm
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I completely agree. As much as I hate cancer and would strangle it senseless if it were something I could wrap my mitts around. I have to say... I wouldn't change my experience for anything. It made me who I am today and I do believe it's for the better. I feel blessed that it was me and not my mom or my sisters. That I was the one to "deal" with it instead of someone that I love so much.
- By MRosebud
- Posted May 4, 2009 at 5:01 pm
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You have echoed my sentiments exactly! Bravo for all of us!
- By Kellie63
- Posted May 5, 2009 at 7:28 am
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It's funny when you said it may sound odd, i must be odd because I completely understand. I have said it so many times cancer has change me for the better.
Warm and healthy thoughts.
- By katelynsmamaw
- Posted May 5, 2009 at 8:08 am
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Hey kellie63--is that Robin Roberts in the photo?
- By pjoseph
- Posted May 5, 2009 at 8:37 am
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It's funny, I ws just thinking this morning how cancer has changed me for the better and thought how odd that was. I also have connected with old friends and am appreciating all my friends and family more. In addition, I am taking care of myself better.
Thank you for posting this, so I don't feel so weird in thinking that cancer has changed me for the better!!
- By momanderson920
- Posted May 5, 2009 at 9:49 am
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Shonna, you are one of the kindest, most insightful, smart, witty....I could go on, people I have ever known. I think you were a really neat person before cancer and are now only more extraordinary. I agree with you that cancer makes you see the world through different eyes....I think BC (before cancer) we figure we may have years to be with the people we love, do the things we planned, and live the way we think we should, but cancer changes all that. And even with an uncertain "expiration date", we still know that much of our time may not be quality time due to chemo, surgeries, doctor's appointments, sick times, etc. so we feel an urgency to savor the good times we have...on or off chemo, etc. I think cancer does make us better people, too. I know I have much more compassion for people who are suffering than I did before and I considered myself a fairly compassionate person before, but now I can REALLY put myself in someone else's shoes with chronic illness...I could not before.
- By katelynsmamaw
- Posted May 5, 2009 at 10:08 am
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Awww..thank you, Cindy. You are a great friend. See, if not for cancer I would not know YOU!
- By dollycat6
- Posted May 5, 2009 at 10:18 am
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You took the words right out of my mouth. Just yesterday I told my husband it's bad enough to have to go through all of this and side effects etc but it would just kill me to see my grandaughter having to go through it.
dollycat6
- By dollycat6
- Posted May 5, 2009 at 10:19 am
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OH! I loved the little thingy you put in about hubby. Ain't it the truth.
- By katelynsmamaw
- Posted May 5, 2009 at 10:25 am
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Oh yeah dollycat, sometimes its real hard!
- By lovemnms
- Posted May 5, 2009 at 5:22 pm
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My temperamental artistic attitude changed. Now, I see the world differently, thank the Lord for each day I'm alive, and let many more things "slide" than I would have in the past. I try everyday to be a better person. I actually mentioned this to my priest yesterday and it brought him to tears.
No one should be afflicted with this but I would gladly take the suffering rather than see my husband or kids sick.
- By katelynsmamaw
- Posted May 5, 2009 at 6:19 pm
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lovemnms, I feel exactly the same way....Better me than them.
- By Teresalynne
- Posted May 5, 2009 at 9:58 pm
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You stated what so many of us feel...thank you so much for sharing your thoughts with us.
Teresa
- By krcheval
- Posted May 6, 2009 at 1:46 am
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I feel the same way. A good friend of mine was diagnosed with breast cancer and we have gone through this experience together (we are the c-sisters--c for chemo, NOT CANCER because we wouldn't dare give it that power!), and have agreed how this journey has been a blessing to both of us in so many ways.
- By katelynsmamaw
- Posted May 6, 2009 at 7:39 am
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krcheval, I also had a good friend that was diagnosed with breast cancer right after I finished chemo. We shared "chemo" stories and feelings that we both had. I never had anyone who had been through it when I had chemo. I never found this site till I was through. :(
- By Kellie63
- Posted May 6, 2009 at 12:55 pm
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Yes it is..I make jewelry for ovarian cancer research and she supports me by wearing my jewelry. I was finally able to meet her and she is an amazing woman. Truly a beautiful person
- By Cindylou198571
- Posted May 7, 2009 at 11:49 am
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You know, I feel the same way.
After my first husbands death and the cancer 8 months later, I realized I must have a reason to be here and that I needed to embrace life. I try to find joy in the little things, make more time to sit and soak up what is going on around me, and not be so negative. I think some times I must sound like pollyanna!
I have tried new things I wouldn't have been brave enough to try, and thanks to a friends introduction, fell in love and got married again.
We are both widowed and he convinced me to get married no matter what, because we all die eventually, it is just sooner for some, and to not get married so that we wouldn't cause pain for the other is just crazy.
I have found that every day is precious, that I don't want to waste my time being angry or stressed, and that I love to just sit and watch the ocean, or children play, or listen to birds sing. I have learned to appreciate the beauty of life and love every minute of it, and on bad days, to really work to find something good that happened that day in spite of the bad.
- By Eileen1941
- Posted May 8, 2009 at 6:33 am
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Hi Katelynsmamaw and everyone,
I echo your feelings completely. If cancer had to come, I would much rather deal with it myself than see any of my loved ones go through it. Before my diagnosis, I had a really bad scare. My husband, who is already dealing with severe diabetes and heart failure, had a blood work result come back that indicated the possible development of cancer. Smudge cells in a complete blood count can be a possible indication of cancer. But it can also indicate a lab error. But I paniced! His doctor said that he would repeat the test in a week to see if the results were the same. That was the longest week in the history of man!! The result of the next CBC showed no evidence of smudge cells, it had been a lab error. And I felt like the world had rolled off my shoulders.
But now we have to deal with my diagnosis and we are doing our best to carry on. Since cancer had to strike our family, I would much rather deal with the disease myself than to have to see Tom, our sons or their families have to deal with it. I know I would be a basket case if cancer struck any of them. You are all right in saying that dealing with a life threatening disease changes the way you view the world. It has helped me to be more compassionate towards others and to value the beauty we have in our world. If only we could transfer this ability to others without them having to go through the illness associated with this awakening. Tom and I have become much closer because of our struggles with illness and we are fortunate to be able to share this journey with all of you. Thank you all for being here!! Eileen
- By Gia
- Posted May 10, 2009 at 4:57 am
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Ladies, I have to admit that 5 1/2 years ago when I was diagnosed with Ovca--if I heard of anyone saying Cancer has changed my life for the better I really wanted to punch them or say "what kind of life did you have?" But over the years I can say I agree with all comments--cancer brings your life into prespective of what is really important--childen, family, friends, etc. I will never forget answering the question to my therapist who I was seeing as I was going through a divorce when I was diagnosed. She asked what is one thing you can say positive and my answer was that I was the one with cancer and not one of my children. As moms that is something for us to hold on to. Happy Mother's Day, Gia
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