Today is my Colposcopy

I think I've known that today has been coming but it really just hit me a few hours ago. I was thinking of my son and daughter and just broke down. I am so scared of my appointment. I have been really sick lately with pain and I wonder if it's related and I am just falling apart. None of my family know, since I can't talk to them. I wouldn't tell my mother because she will tell the whole family and her friends so I dont trust her with that information. Since I wouldnt' say anything, she is insisting that I am pregnant. Hurtful that she won't even take the time to even care. So I'm going in about an hour. And I've heard some women say it doesn't hurt and some say was awful, so I'm not sure what to expect. I just hope and pray that it is a good outcome. I don't know how to handle all of this by myself. It helps knowing that there is this wonderful group of women who are so supportive. Wish me luck!!!