Going on 9 months

I know it has been a while. I had to take care of my grandma for a while and had no computer access. I have been going through a lot recently and emotionally. If it wasnt for my little girl I think I would have lost it a long time ago. Alice is getting so big and getting ready to crawl and I am not so sure I am quite ready for that yet. I recently have had my doctor try a new method to help my Fibro and thats with a Tens unit( or Electro therapy). I am not sure what to think about it right now but I have only had it for a few days. Alice still has no teeth quite yet and its been an ongoing drool fest and doctor saying oh she will cut teeth soon...well that has been since she has been 3 months. She has been not sleeping so well recently and that has been taking a huge toll on me as well. I hope she goes back to normal very soon and that is just a growth spurt. My RA has been getting bad recently as well and has been really hard on me as well. My depression has been a roller coaster and they have been trying to help me with different medications for that. Sometimes I feel like I am not going to be good enough for Alice because I can barely lift her any more and she is like maybe 17 pounds and that really isnt that heavy. I dont even feel like doing much any more and dont have the notion to take care of myself. I do more for Alice than I attempt to do for myself....maybe its just a hump I am trying to get over or what but I hope things change for me. I really want to buy a home but dont have the means to and I dont want to rent any more due to having such shitty luck with landlords...I dont get enough of an income I feel like to even get everything Alice needs and I would like to get her. I just dont know what to do anymore. I feel like and epic failure.

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