Heaven has a new angel, my beautiful Mom has passed

Mom passed away last night, at home and surrounded by her loving family. She went to the ER on Monday for shortness of breath, they took a CT scan showing both lungs with very little healthy tissue left in either lung. She was admitted and given 24-48 hrs. We took her home on hospice Wednesday, her last thoughts, requests and words were unheard by 4 of her 5 children as we were in another room being instructed by the hospice admitting nurse who took 2 1/2 hours to go over several instructions we knew we were unlikely to ever utilize. We tried to get the nurse to take a break, but she seemed intent on getting the paperwork done and 'clocking out'. By the time she was through at 6:30 p.m., Mom was asleep; she slept for 26 hrs. til the end and never woke up again, not even through the night when we gave her her meds. and stayed vigil by her bedside. She died at 8:29 p.m. on Thursday. I know many have a great experience with hospice, but ours was not the case. I feel robbed, especially when the nurse knew how little time Mom had left.
I miss her so very much, and though I know she is in a better place breathing easier, I selfishly want her back with me, and all of us. I don't know how I am going to endure the days and months ahead; there is a hole in my heart that can never be filled.
Sorry this is not very inspiring, but I do want to say that this site has been my lifeline in the months since October, and everyone has been wonderful. I want to thank all of you that took so much of your time to read and reply to my posts. And also for all of your thoughts and prayers. I wish you all, the best of health, and hope you find your way to NED. God had other plans for my wonderful mother, but for all of you I pray and hope for the best of outcomes.
Take Care and God Bless,
Becky

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Becky my heart breaks for you. I know it's hard. My husband never made it home for hospice. Admitted on a Wednesday night and died Sunday. Monday hospice was suppose to bring a bed and get set up.

The hospital was great to him and I sat with him day and night. Our girls would come up at night after school or stayed on the weekend. They were there by his side Sunday as well.

Just remember they are not in pain anymore.

Take care
Stanifa

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Becky I am sorry for your the loss of your beautiful mom. Yes, that would make me mad too and honestly I would tell them they would have to come into the room with me to finish her "work" while I sat with my loved one. That was callous and should be reported. Not that it brings any comfort to you now.

I think your mom knows you all were there. Take comfort in that .

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I am so sorry for your loss. I still miss my Mom.

May you find peace..

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I'm sorry for the loss of your Mom and that you had a bad experience with Hospice. I was with my Mom when she spoke her last words the day before she passed. Unfortunately, I couldn't understand what she was trying to say. I pray that God will comfort you and your family and give you peace at this difficult time.

Becky

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Becy, so sorry for your loss , believe me you are not the only one who had trouble with HOSPICE , BILL

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My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family and your mom,

I hope you will contact the hospice management about this nurse. Not for the sake of complaining but rather teaching. This should not have happened . Save another family from this pain.

Marie

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Hospice care is nice but not all make it to their care. My brother is one but the hospice nurse was there and did the paper work after the passing took place. She was not in a hurry to clock out. Sorry for your loss ! Pat

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Becky, so sorry to hear of the passing of your precious Mom. You know she's in a better place now and you'll fill the hole in your heart with love and memories. I wish I'd had the opportunity to take my mom home but we brought her to the hospital and she passed that same night. I consider it a blessing that she was no longer suffering and in time, you will too. My condolences to you and your family.
Take care, Judy

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Becky - I am so sorry for your loss. Not all Hospice organizations are the same, it is like getting a Dr. you have to research. I am sorry that this one took away precious time with your mom. May you find peace in the lovely memories your mom has left you with.
Hugs-Janet

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I wasn't there when my mom passed away either. We weren't expecting it so soon. It happened in the morning at a rehab hospital. I was going to see her that night and was shocked when I got the call.

But I've been told that people often choose when to slip away, and they also often want to do it alone. Don't be angry.

I'm so sorry for your loss. It's so hard, I know. I lost my mom in October. It's awful.

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Becky, I am so sorry for your loss. I feel I will never recover from the loss of my Alan. We also did not have a good experience with hospice. I told about it in the discussion titled Hospice. I know there is a tremendous void in your life that time is supposed to heal. Hope that is the case for all of us.
God Bless you and your family.
LIz

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I'm deeply sorry for the loss of your beautiful Mom. May you find peace and comfort in the days ahead. Believe me, she knew you were there with her.

Blessings,
Cyn

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My deepest sympathy is sent to you today. Your Mom will always be dear in your heart. As soon as you heal from the pain of these last few days, you will be able to move dear sweet memories to the front of your mind. These precious memories will endear your heart for years to come until you meet heaven.
May peace come to you so you will not hurt so bad.
Julie JB

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Becky I am so sorry for your loss and for your hospice experience..personally she should have done it in the room your mom was in so maybe should could have had a say..that is what they did with my husband he was right there and heard all and if he had any questions he would ask her..again I am so sorry for your loss..Debbie

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I am so sorry for your loss! My mother has worked for a hospice organization for over 20 years and she wanted me to let you know that what you experienced is totally unacceptable and that nurse should be reported! They have to go through vigorous training and take an oath that their first priority is the patient and families' well being! The nurses are never denied OT and if the family needs a nurse to stay, they should or arrange for another nurse to relieve her! I can't imagine the feelings you are going through, but thanks to your post, you have already helped so many others ! May you find some kind of peace and no she is in heaven without suffering anymore!

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My thoughts and prayers are with you and your
family.

MARIA

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Becky,
I am so very sorry for your loss. I sent you a PM also.
Hugs,
Rose

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Hi Becky.
I am so so sorry for the loss of your mother. I lost my mom in July and I know how unfair and hard it is. My family did not have a good experience with hospice either. I still wonder if the medications that they told us to give her, was an "overdose" and started her on a downward spiral. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.
Hugs,
Christine

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I'm sorry to hear about your Mom. My thoughts are with you and your family.

Hugs,
Robin

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