Mom passed away last night, at home and surrounded by her loving family. She went to the ER on Monday for shortness of breath, they took a CT scan showing both lungs with very little healthy tissue left in either lung. She was admitted and given 24-48 hrs. We took her home on hospice Wednesday, her last thoughts, requests and words were unheard by 4 of her 5 children as we were in another room being instructed by the hospice admitting nurse who took 2 1/2 hours to go over several instructions we knew we were unlikely to ever utilize. We tried to get the nurse to take a break, but she seemed intent on getting the paperwork done and 'clocking out'. By the time she was through at 6:30 p.m., Mom was asleep; she slept for 26 hrs. til the end and never woke up again, not even through the night when we gave her her meds. and stayed vigil by her bedside. She died at 8:29 p.m. on Thursday. I know many have a great experience with hospice, but ours was not the case. I feel robbed, especially when the nurse knew how little time Mom had left.
I miss her so very much, and though I know she is in a better place breathing easier, I selfishly want her back with me, and all of us. I don't know how I am going to endure the days and months ahead; there is a hole in my heart that can never be filled.
Sorry this is not very inspiring, but I do want to say that this site has been my lifeline in the months since October, and everyone has been wonderful. I want to thank all of you that took so much of your time to read and reply to my posts. And also for all of your thoughts and prayers. I wish you all, the best of health, and hope you find your way to NED. God had other plans for my wonderful mother, but for all of you I pray and hope for the best of outcomes.
Take Care and God Bless,