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FEAR

Jim08
3 Recommendations

We fear what we don't understand. A way to overcome fear is to look directly at it. Directly, don't turn away, look in all the dark and shadowy places. Understand the best and worst of the situation. Look at it until you understand it.
I have read that the opposite of love is fear. Consider that. Also consider how much better love is then fear. I understand how difficult it is to look at what you are afraid of because I have, and it made me weep. However overcoming my fear has improved my life immeasurably.
With love
Jim

Explore topics in this discussion:

Cancer Tylenol Pain

24 replies

cuddles53

That is good advice Jim, thank you. One of my fears is hearing about all the truths to my illness, like exactly how big the tumors are, how many, has it spread, my prognosis, I don't know how I would feel if I really had all of the answers, so if I look fear in the face and find out all of the answers, I guess my fear is what my facial expression will look like to the people telling me this news. when really thinking this out it is that, that bothers me the most, having my own doctor and nurse practioner see me cry, that is what will bother me, I try and look the best I can, and as far from sick as possible when I go to them, if this isn't ridiculous I don't know what is. I take my oxygen with me and wear it right up until when I go into to see them, then I just take it with me so they are not aware I use it all the time. I do not understand why I refuse to let them think they have got the best of me. I guess that is what it is, but I am going to try just what you are saying and see what happens. Thanks again for the advice. I hate looking vulnerable to anyone, and I hate sympathizing eyes staring me down. This is what it feels like to me going in and having things expalined to me about myself.
Sandy

Jim08

Sandy
I'm sure your medical team has had patients cry before. Don't worry about being a tough chick. Show them you understand your situation and like any rational person it make you sad. Sad is an emotion like happy. When you feel it, you should express it.

brooklynda

Hi Jim: I agree! I can't always do it though! When I'm afraid I try to take myself all the way thru it. I ask myself: "if------", then "what". And then "if that happens"--what? I remember being in my Cancer Wellness support group and someone saying "suppose the cancer comes back?" Another member said "then it will be taken care of much more quickly than the first time they found it." Like I said, I can't always do it, especially around scan time, but it's always something to aim for to bring me peace! Whatever it is - it is, but I express my feelings because if I don't I feel isolated and that's not good! That's one of the reasons this site is so great - we don't have to keep these feelings inside. Hope all is well with you! Blessings! Brooklynda

Jim08

Brooklynda
One of the many great things we learn here is that we are all different. What works for one, works for one. I just want to share what works for me. I think we all bring here the things that we benefit from. Favorite books, foods, herbs, prayers. Accepting the fact that my life may be shortened by cancer has freed me of the worst part of living with cancer, the fear.
I know of no relief for scanxiety
Peace
Jim

brooklynda

Jim: I really admire your acceptance! That's really great!

Jim08

I have not given up. I am more then willing to be the one that beats the odds. But I will accept what ever adventure awaits me in the next plane of existence. Unlike most here I have no idea what will happen to me after I "pass". I am kind of hoping the sea of fire thing is wrong.
Jim

KATHEF

Jim, your hat scares me. Kathy

Farmerswife

I have heard from reliable sources that the sea of fire thing is absolutely wrong.

Susan

brooklynda

Jim: We already did the "sea of fire" = cancer!

kq182

Jim, cool hat, cool attitude = Cool Guy!!!
Stay positive and help us beat this beast!!
Karen

Jim08

Karen, as much as I want to look cool. I sure don't want to scare anyone.
Kathef, I will be back home tomorrow and will load a new picture.

Jim08

Susan & Brooklynda, I sure hope you are right.
Susan, I have some other questions for your sources.

Sherri2

I guess i don't fear dieing is the pain that might come with it..
and not being able to care for myself and those I love

kelsterlv

Jim your philosophy & outlook inspire me. I hope someday I can have your outlook, I try but am not there yet:) Kelly. P.S. You should keep the hat! lol

KATHEF

Keep the picture, Jim. I was just teasing you. Have a good day. Kathy

Farmerswife

Sorry, the sources only take 10 questions a month and I have used my quota. Most of the news has been very reassuring, so just don't dwell on it.

Reassurance about that end of things is reliable advice.

It's while we're dealing HERE with this stuff that reassurance has its limits.

Gotta go--got a bite!

Susan

Jim08

Sherri2,
I have been assured by people I trust that they will not let me suffer.
You are considerably younger then my 58 years. My dependents are all independent. I love my family and leaving them makes me sad. That is why I am on antidepressants.

Jim08

Susan,
Fish or mosquito?

Sherri2

antidepressants make my hair feel funny.. So I just don't worry about it.. cause I don't feel I can change what gonna happen.. I believe when it is your time it your time..

I do get Hydrocodone for pain. and I buck it up tylenol PM for when it seem bad and cant sleep

So far it been do-able but is scary thinking that it gonna get worse.. Pain wise.. At least in Dogs if they are in pain they put to sleep but in people they seem to leave them lay there and sufffer

as long as you got good insurance that is

snowflower

Jim, Brooklyn, everyone who has participated in this discussion.....I want to thank all of you as I have read this dialogue over and over again and it has helped me. I will remember it in my darkest moments to uplift me. Thank you and God Bless........Viki

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