Am I in denial?

Hi, All. It has been 3 1/2 + years now that Don has had Stage IV NSCLC. He gets weekly chemo treatments, and has been through radiation, surgery and chemo, at least 6 times. Once or twice he was able to take 4 or 5 months off from the chemo, but this last time he was told that this regimen will be weekly chemo with Carboplatin and Gemzar, with Avastin added every 3 weeks. They also told him he would be on some maintenance drug now for the rest of his life. He is still working, and doesn't want to quit, although he is now eligible for SS, at age 66. But it seems to me, that he is going to be around for a long, long time. I think this, because the cancer has not spread to any other part of his body, other than his right lung. He did have it in 2 mediasturnum (sp?) lymph nodes at the very beginning, but the chemo took care of them. Also, in all of this time, his blood counts, both red and white have always been perfect. So I think that this means that he is "safe". Is this just wishful thinking? I just can't imagine life without him!
Bonnie

By cards7up
Posted November 1, 2009 at 7:27 am
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Hi, I don't know if I'd call it wishful thinking, I'd call it hope for the future. Since he has done so well, I can imagine you're probably waiting for the sky to fall. Don't! Just enjoy your life with him now. Who knows what tomorrow will bring, we all die of something. He is doing well and wants to work, so let him do it. Unless of course, you'd like to take the time to go travel or do something crazy! Take care, JC

By TamiO
Posted November 1, 2009 at 9:05 am
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I think many of the people on this site have proven that miracles happen all the time. And I have always said that a "healthy dose of denial has gotten me through many scary things". ;-) Continue believing, and pray during the times your faith is shaken.

By dfcmike
Posted November 1, 2009 at 10:05 am
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The future is promised to no one.

Enjoy every minute and live, learn, and love.

Working is obviously enjoyable to him and gives him a purpose to put his feet on the floor every morning. That maybe a reason he is doing so well.

If you have a why you can live with any what.

By DonsBon
Posted November 1, 2009 at 10:58 am
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Thank you all for your replies. I CHOOSE to believe that he will be here for a long, long time! He has amazed even his Drs, and they use him as inspiration to their other patients.
Bonnie

By Marylou1
Posted November 1, 2009 at 2:07 pm
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Bonnie,
Don's story is absolutely amazing !! He's Superman without the suit. But also has a great wife to support him through all of the treatment he has been through.

YOU need to take a bow as well, for caregivers are many times left out in the cold, when it's been them that have kept the patient going during hard times.

I salute both of you, Don for being Superman, and You for being right behind him every step of the way.

ENJOY LIFE !! If he loves to work, fine, but get him to take time off to do some things that both of you can enjoy.

Much Love to both of you,
Marylou

By cuddles53
Posted November 1, 2009 at 5:38 pm
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I feel like you do. I am a 3 year and 9 month survivor sounds pretty much the same, I had it spread to the lymph nodes, and it is in the pleural fluid also, so I am a satge lV, but I am still here. My regular attending doc told me last time I saw him, he thinks I am cured! I said What! Cured, I was told never would I be cured, he said well if it hasn't come back yet, it might not. so I am feeling like you, and waiting all the time. I need to get on with life and live, and I haven't been able to do that. I think the words we heard of palliative therapy stuck in my head, and it just won't come out. I don't know how to change any of this, I am not in the good shape it sounds as if your husband is in,. I am on oxygen,and have a lot of shortness of breath, not much energy and certainly no motivation. I stay in most of the time.
Good luck, and God bless Sandy

By maryalice
Posted November 1, 2009 at 8:46 pm
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Dear Sandy, I tried to send you an email from your profile, but it did not go thru. Anyway, I just wanted to tell you how much I enjoy your responses and today I was sad because you sounded so lonely. I have 7 brothers and sisters and a wonderful mother who dropped everything to help me, and still I never felt more alone. I think this is a very lonely and isolating disease. Thank you for all you do and say to people on this site. We are the only ones that know how this feels. You are never alone really, we are in this together.
Take care, and keep posting.
Peace,
MA

By cuddles53
Posted November 1, 2009 at 8:55 pm
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Thanks Maryalice, I know you are right, it doesn't matter how many people it seems are all in this with us,, we still feel so isolated don't we?. thanks for noticing, a little kindness goes a long way, I don't see a whole lot of it lately in this world, so someone nice like you should be told you are.
god bless Sandy

By garyc
Posted November 1, 2009 at 9:29 pm
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Glad to hear he is doing fine. My wife, Beverley just got word from her doctor that her NSCLC was gone. All she has is scare tissue on the lung. I thank God for this and feel he is watching over her and I hope her's dosen't come back. Bonnie I feel like God is taking care of your husband too. In God all things are possible. By his stripes we are healed. Keep the faith and God will protect both of you.

By leslieking
Posted November 1, 2009 at 10:52 pm
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I'm glad I'm not alone in the way I feel. This disease does make me feel isolated. I have an extremely supportive husband and family spread out over the US that constantly send cards, emails, and prayers. But ultimately I am the one here on oxygen looking forward to weekly chemo so I can be in the company of others like me. Thanks to all on this site who know and share their trials with lung cancer. My prayers are with all of you. Keep sharing........Leslie

By DonsBon
Posted November 1, 2009 at 11:23 pm
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I want to thank all of you for your support and words of encouragement! Cuddles, I feel so bad for you, because you sound so lonely. But at least your Dr. says he thinks that you're cured! Don's cancer is metastisizing, and is now at the lower lobe where he had the plueral effusion, and also at the top of the lobe, in 2 spots. Many little ones at the bottom and only about 3 that they measure. He uses oxygen only at night when he sleeps, but doesn't want to use it anymore because it dries out his mouth. Today was a bad day, because he got all 3 chemos Friday, and so he was very fatigued, low energy, no appetite. But it gets better as the week goes on. Cuddles, I wish you lived nearby! You could come on over!
Bonnie

By Cancerblog
Posted November 2, 2009 at 8:29 am
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I was Stage III A when they found my lung tumor. It was inoperable and I thought I was a deadman. Two years later here I am with no evidence of disease. You would never know to look at me that I have lung cancer. I now enjoy every day with my wife and family and friends. There is so much to do and so little time to do it -- even if I live another 20 years. Live you life and enjoy every day. The rest is in God's hands.

Welcome to Inspire!

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