Advice on support

Sappho9433
0 Recommendations

My Dad recently had his first Taxotere treatment, this being second line, first treatment did not work. He is weak and down physically and mentally. I tell him he is brave and strong....but what does he really need to hear.....are there other things I could say to him to help him along in this very dark and scary time? I have realized that me talking to other people is the best therapy for me, but when it comes to talking to my Dad I feel at a loss for words or that I am saying the wrong things. I just want to be strong and supportive.

5 replies

Dana

Just let him know how much you love him. Telling him he is brave and strong is very helpful (I'm sure he wonders what he looks like in your eyes.)

Don't put pressure on him like he "has to fight." But let him know you would like him to fight this beast and you'll be at his side every step.

Your dad is blessed to have you. You obviously care very much. With that alone, you're helping him more than you'll ever know.

Take care of yourself too!
~Dana

Marie400

As Dana said, be sure you let him know how much you love him. And be sure you understand what he wants. If he wants to fight this horrible disease, make sure he knows you're right there fighting the fight with him. If he doesn't have the strength or desire for a fight you also make sure he knows you are in his corner.

BetsyT

Would your Dad come on this board? If not maybe you could read him some posts/discussions. The isolation of this disease is the worst part. As for what you can do...All I ever wanted from anyone was for them to JUST BE THERE-And yeah,that's easier said than done -It takes strength of character & tapping into deep reserves-Something you sound willing to do,because you care...Best to you, Betsy

hopefuldaughter

I don't have much new advice and I am often in the same predicament. But, I've found just smiling and trying to talk about normal things is helpful to my mom. Also, she likes knowing we are on hand, it gives her a sense of comfort. And it goes without saying to just tell him you love him!

Sappho9433

Thanx for the kind words, I tell him 20 times a day how much I love him, I think some days are easier than others, today is one of those bad days. this site has helped so much, I just don't feel alone. It's particularly hard being an only child, my father as well is an only child. I am very thankful for every minute. But there is always that part of me that just wants to make it all go away, like a magic wave of the wand or something...Thanx again.

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