12 Signs You've Joined a Cheap HMO

1 Recommendation

1.Staff physicians include Dr. Who, Dr. Kevorkian, and Dr. Demento.

2.Tongue depressors taste faintly of Fudgesicle.

3.Annual breast exam conducted at Hooters.

4.With your last HMO, your birth control pills didn't come in different colors with little "M's" on them.

5.Your "primary care physician" is wearing the pants you gave to Goodwill last month.

6. Directions to your doctor's office include, "take a left when you enter the trailer park."

7. Your kidney transplant surgery is held up while your surgeon awaits his arraignment for grave robbing.

8. The only expense covered 100% is embalming.

9. Only proctologist in the plan is "Gus" from Roto-Rooter.

10. Only item listed under Preventive Care feature of coverage is "an apple a day".

11.“Patient responsible for 200% of out-of-network charges" is not a typo..

12. You ask for Viagra. You get a Popsicle stick and duct tape.

seMPer fidelis

Dave

11 replies

Ohhh Dave - you are just too much! I love your posts! Where do you come up with this stuff! Thanks for a good laugh today!

Erin

OH MY GOD!! Think I'm going to peeee my pants! TOO TOO FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!

my favorite is #2 - thanks dave

My insurance company keeps trying to tell me that #11 is correct and the the first $100 goes to the doctor while the second $100 goes to the insurance company. That is after I pay them my premiums!!! Good Stuff!!

LOL,,,

Wait till my insurance company gets the bill for five (5) chemotherapy pills (Temedor) $3367.13.

Oh well,,, looks like some insurance executive better go ahead and kiss his Christmas bonus GOODBYE!!

seMPer fidelis

Dave

Dave,
Thanks for the laugh- needed one today. Keep it up.
Sharon

Dave,
You are the best! We can always depend on you to give us something to laugh about when we need it the most.
Love ya,
Brenda

HAHAHA..............Oh geezz, my fav. is #12. Wait until I send this to my daughter. She will laugh her arse off.
*Hugs*
Marylou

You're a welcome addition to this website! I don't post very much, but I read the messages every day. You brought a smile to my morning. Keep up with the humor - we all need it!
Always with hope and prayers -- Pat J.

Hi Dave, glad to see your still kicking! Now I just want to know if you've been talking to my wife. I've used #12 for years only its a matchstick and scotchtape. lmao. - John

Dave,
I've heard Duct tape is good for a lot of things but wow! It also comes in colors! Thanks for the laugh!

Liz

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