In January of 2008 I found this site from reading Kathy Kastan's book. I had reached a point in my recovery were I needed to understand more about what happened to me. I went on Amazon.com and started ordering books. Some were outdated when I received them some were great. One was Kathy's who led me here. The wealth of info and encouragement I received from this site was essential to my continued emotional healing as well as lots of good nitty gritty information.
First I was quietly reading amazed by the wealth of knowledge, compassion and wonderful writing. I started seeing particularly ones like Gracie, Mystic, and others share their thoughts and lives with there cyber heart sisters. So I went for it and wrote my first journal I ever posted on the internet. It was like a champagne cork popping. Way too much poured out initially. So much pent up inside. I wrote with needs and questions that others responded to and sometimes didn't. I felt like it was a fishing expedition. No disrespect. Who would respond? What would they say?
I so looked forward to checking "my WomenHeart site" each and everyday and then this needy girl finally got you can respond to those who responded to you. Relationships formed. Soon I started reaching out to others as my heart sisters had done for me. We are such links in a chain.
So here I am thirteen months later and find that full time work plus taking care of my 86 year old Dad who has been with me since May has begun to diminish my capacity to keep up with this site that gave so much to me. Where I would visit for hours sometimes...now there are just forays into connecting here and there. Mind you this is not a goodbye missive but it is about balance.
I have learned that we cannot do all the things we want to do in this life and this type A girl burned herself out doing this previous to her heart attack. So this journal is merely saying I love you guys and am still here but some of the hours once spent on this site are now directed towards my Dad which I know you all understand. Just wanted to let you know how important you have all been to me in making me think, holding myself accountable, learning more, encouraging me, telling our stories to help others and fully knowing I have made friends who will always be there to understand. So I balance my time with a little regret in losing some of the continuity and relationships BUT Friday Throw Down will not be forsaken. Trust me! This week is looking good. Big Hugs, Spuds