IVF after miscarriage?

Hello. Can anyone tell me how long they waited to proceed with IVF after a miscarriage? After 10 months of visiting the doctor, we became pregnant on our first IVF try (after several failed IUIs). I got to see the heart beat, then at 7wks, 6 days, had a m/c. There was no warning for the m/c.
Im not emotionally ready to go through all the visits/blood work/retrieval at this time. Im too scared and wonder if I'll ever be ready again. When I called the clinic to tell them, and all these terrible feelings crept up.
Im afraid IVF wont take the second time, and if it does, we cant be excited about being pregant b/c we might m/c again. Pregancy should be a joyous time, and it wont be b/c we will be wondering, will the other shoe fall? Any advise?

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i just wanted to send some strength and good wishes your way...nobody knows why some IVFs work and others don't or why the miscarriages..but the most common cause of not implanting or miscarrying is the fetus not being normal...a lot of it is chance, and the fact that u have been successful with the pregnancy itself suggests u have a good chance of being successful again..i can understand it is hard to feel happy or excited when u have been through something like that..i am truly sorry for your loss, and hope u see happiness in the rest of this journey..

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Hi,

I don't have any advice yet on when to try again, but I wanted to share that I went through almost the same thing. Our first IVF failed, then on our second IVF, I was finally pregnant! I don't have to tell you how happy we were, and how normal we felt. Then, last Friday we also lost the baby and the pain has been indescribable. i had my d&c this morning.

I hope you can recover from this emotionally as soon as you are able. you will know when you're ready to try again. Don't force yourself into anything you aren't ready for. Just keep talking and sharing here. If it wasn't for this place, I don't know what i would do.

hugs and understanding,
t.

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Oh, I understand this. I had a miscarriage (2nd trimester and d/c) after IUI and I am just starting another round of IUI. I know this is different from IVF, but I think deciding when to try again depends on your overall health and why you miscarried- if you know. Best of luck. And I offer my sympathy to you and disco2k on the loss of your babies.

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ladies-
thanks for your kind words. it definitely helps to read others thoughts and input. i know its hard for DH to relate, and he is grieving in his own way. we are taking one day at a time. not looking forward to mother's day. i have been trying to keep busy and not focus on the topic. i did not have a d/c because i felt my body has been through enough, and was already in the m/c process. i wish i had a magic wand for all of us. my heart goes out to us all. and this message board definitely helps. helps with the sorrow and to vent the anger and hurt.
j

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All the reasons of infertility can be divided into 9 groups. So, let say there are 9 reasons of infertility. Only one reason belongs to a man, and the rest eight - to a woman. If a couple can not concieve then, before undertaking ANY treatment, they have to undertake tests (sperm, blood, urine and the monitoring of the immune system). The main test for man is the sperm's test. If it is OK, then 8 reasons left and all these reasons are inside a woman.
If a woman was pregnant it means that there are only 4 reasons why she can not concieve. One, may be more, of these 4 reasons caused a miscarrige. There are list of tests which have to be done in order to find out which of the reasons prevent a woman to concieve. All these tests MUST BE DONE!!!
Having all these tests done, a good gyneacologist will be able to tell a woman why she can not get pregnant and why she had a miscarriage. To cope with these reasons, a woman DOES NOT HAVE to have IVF. If a woman had a miscarrige, does not know why she had it, and not attempting to find out then 99% that the IVF either will be unsuccessful or may lead to a miscarrige again. After all, after finding out the reason, the IVF may not be neccessary. The IVF is for those who have problems with their reproductive system or simply do not now how to have a proper intercourse!!!
Now, if you look at an IVF treatment from doctor's point of view them it is nothing else than business. What they want is to get your money. Of course, they will tell you nice words and will do their job professionally - no doubt about that. However, the fact that they offer a woman after a miscarrige an IVF treatment without finding out the reason for a miscarrige is nothing else than froud. To find a real reason of a miscarrige and to cure this reason(s) is much cheaper. But who cares? Woman's doctor supplies a client (this woman) to an infertility clinic where she spends her money. And a woman, because of the lack of knowledge, is simply used as a money making machine.
In addition, psychologically, every woman sees an IVF as the last resort, as the last hope to get pregnant. Unsuccess is a real blow and causes depression ALWAYS. But who cares again? Possibility to have an IVF again brings new hope to a woman's heart and good income to an ifertility clinic.
Ladies!!! Be careful - you are cheated!!!

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MENT

Not sure about that last post. However, most doctors will not do blood work until a woman has had 3 miscarriages. Yes, it definitely isn't fair and I was lucky that they ran tests on me after 2 miscarriages, but I still had 2 after that.

But to the question at hand...I had a miscarriage in October and then did IVF in February. I also had a miscarriage in April and did IVF in November. It is hard to start again. After 4 miscarriages I was blessed with a beautiful girl from the above mentioned IVF cycle in November. Since we had her we have had another one. We have now decided to try to conceive again. The other day I went into the doctor and he asked me if I was excited to start trying to have another baby. I told him "no, I'm nervous" and that I didn't want to have another miscarriage. No matter how many miscarriages you have gone through whenever you get pregnant you worry. You worry about spotting, about lack of symptoms, every little twinge, every little ache is scary. But it is normal to feel this way. Please know that you are not alone in your feelings. Do what you feel you can handle and I am here to offer any support you need. Good luck.

Michele

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ASH_Russia, hmm, I think DH would be upset to hear "some people do not know how to have proper intercourse." This made me lol!
DH and I do not fall into any typcial infertility categories. All our bloodwork is fine; our health is fine, weight, eating habits- we are very healthy. The ONLY thing that is keeping us from conceiving, according to the doctor, is my age.
I also do not agree that women, or couples go into infertility treatment blindly or without doing research.
I do agree it can be a scam if your clinic does not care about you, and treats you as just another 'number'. I do agree some clinics are just out there to make money. And yes, depression does occur after one loses a child; at any stage.
I have stayed away from this site, due to the fact we currently are not seeking IVF. We are considering adoption, but that has opened up a whole new set of feelings/reservations/questions/research.
Best of luck to everyone out there!

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Hi, Justus
The reason which you call "your age" is VERY ambiguous. The most interesting is what stands behind "your age" reason. And this "most interesting" must be tested.
The following link is not for advertising puropses. Treat it as "just some information":
http://www.miscarriageclinic.co.uk/causes.html

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I have to also totally disagree with ASH_Russia. Lots and lots of people have unexplained infertility. I have unexplained infertility, and DH and I are in our 20s. Like Justus it took IVF to get pregnant for the first time, and unfortunately that ended in a m/c.......however I believe what we were told that the vast majority of the time a single miscarriage is a genetic problem with that embryo that is very unlikely to occur again, and I hope and pray that it is a good sign that we were able to get pregnant at all.

We are lucky that our RE did run the full m/c panel before we even did IVF....for other reasons.... and it was all normal. I'm not sure what else you would suggest we do before it was ok to try IVF again, but I think there is still lots and lots in medicine that we just can't explain or understand yet.

I'm sure you mean to be helpful but as someone who works in the medical field I can tell you that I do care about my pts and I'm sure the majority of our RE's also worry about their pts and want them to have the children they work so hard for.

Justus-

I'm not sure how we are supposed to try again without being scared, I share your thoughts on that. I hope that by taking some time off to regroup before trying again though I will be able to go into it feeling positive.....but I do think DH and I will for sure feel cautious early on if we are lucky enough to get pregnant again, that's only natural aftering going through a m/c. I hope that time will help us both!

Katie

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I am thinking ASH RUSSIA would definitely think myself and DP are not "doing it right" LOL.

Shoopy

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