Desire to have another baby but

At age 27 my husband and I were diagnoised with IF. He has 2% morphology and we have a less than 2% chance of conceiving on our own. We went through six rounds of Clomid, four IUI's, a failed IVF due to poor response, a failed fresh cycle resulting in miscarriage, and our miracle baby through a frozen cycle where we put in our last three embryos and had a twin pregnancy and miscarried one. I am so grateful for our daughter but still have a sense that our family is not complete. I would love nothing more than to have another one and give her a sibling however I know the IVF roller coster all too well and the financial burden it becomes. I know my story is not nearly as horrible as most and I am lucky to have "at least one" but I can't help this desire to have another..... Looking for any imput! Thanks

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Lots of MENTS in this post....

I totally hear you and understand where you are coming from.
It took me 3 fresh cycles to finally get my DD (we have male factor and poor egg quality issues) - and then miraculously got pregnant on our own (when docs told us IVF was our only option - we weren;t even candidates for IUI before we started the IVF process). So I have two beautiful little girls and still feel like my family is not complete.
We recently did our 4th fresh cycle - got over 20 eggs and thawed all the embryos we had from cycle 2 and 3 and only ONE embryo made it to day 5 (damn egg quality), anyway that one took but heartbreakingly i had a misscarriage around 15 weeks. And now I long for another baby even more - I just feel I want one more to complete our family. I know I am VERY blessed but I still long. I personally will try again and I'm not ready to give up yet.

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I say go for it! I'm about to start ivf to have my second, got the paperwork for the loan signed yesterday. It's what we want, a sibling for our daughter. And 10 years from now hopefully this will be a memory. It does seem like it might be a difficult road ahead with the possibility of ups and downs. But if in your heart it is what you want you should do it :-) you might be able to tell I've spent a lot of time thinking about the same things. Good luck!

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I know exactly how you feel!! I have a wonderful six year old son who asks for a baby brother every single day. I did IVF in August got BFP but unfortunately had a M/C. It has been a really rough few months. It took my pregnancy hormone level over three months to get down to zero. AF finally came last week. I am so ready to try again. I don't have time on my side though. I turned 42 last month. However like you I don't feel like our family is complete. I wish you the best of luck. I'm trying to keep a positive outlook even though this is an emotional roller coaster. I'm not giving up quite yet.

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Angela,
15 weeks is so tragic I am very sorry for your loss and I wish you lots of luck in the future to expand your family. Did you do a shared risk when doing IVF or did your insurance cover it or neither?

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I wish all you ladies lots of luck this is such a stressful journey. tdgbb2013 one of the things that drives me more is that conversation you had with your child. I live in fear of the day my daughter asks my husband and I for a sibling. What if we do another round of IVF and it doesn't work and we can't afford to do it again and we can't give her that sibling. What if we do it and have a lot of extra embryos left over? All these questions are constantly on my mind.

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I know exactly how you feel. We have a five year old daughter. We also lost a full term infant son one year before her, and now since her have had 3 mc (and 1 mc before our son). We are currently pursuing IUI but I always wonder if I should just be happy with our daughter. Glad I'm not the only one who has a desire for more. Our family will always feel incomplete because our son isn't here, but we would love a sibling for our daughter. My daughter knows she has 5 siblings in heaven, but prays every night for a baby that will come home to our house.

The financial burden of IVF is so hard, hope you have peace with whatever decision you make.

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I am with all of you. I have a wonderful daughter, age 5, conceived on our first IVF cycle and have been trying to give her a sibling for the last 4 years. That first success gave such a false sense of security. 8 failed transfers later and the desire for another child is stronger than ever. After considering many options for so many years, we've decided to go the gestational carrier route. I just signed with an agency to find a carrier. It was a hard decision to make and I am still ambivalent about it, but I know, as life goes on, I will never regret building my family the way that I want it. Best of luck to you!

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