RESENTMENT vs GUILT

I just stopped myself from replying to a post regarding caregiver resentment for cancer patients, and it's acceptance! I feel this is a 'open wound' subject that 'we' should discuss with a broad range of members .

I sincerely hope that the patient NEVER thinks, feels or is informed of such resentment. The post and/or replies also mentioned resentment as a result of the patients who bring this cancer onto themselves!!!

I certainly hope no caregiver, family member or friend of this patient is unaware of exactly how this patient would feel if they heard such a statement, "it's normal to feel resentment when you are caring for a cancer
patient "

Have, those of you that think it is normal or acceptable to feel resentment for the cancer patient they are taking care of, ever thought how much, in lieu of a more descriptive word, "guilt" we cancer patients may feel for 'forcing', you the caregiver, friend or family member, to take care of us?

I, for one am appalled, that any 'loved one' would resent and/or blame a cancer patient for
'forcing' others to act as caregivers.

In my 55 years I have been both the caregiver and the cared for. I can definitively say, the caregiver role is the most desirable of the two!!!

If we perpetuate any form of justification, how can we wonder why society thinks we deserve cancer? You may have a choice to be a caregiver. But, I can't let you think any one chooses cancer.
I look forward to your comments and/or arguments to the contrary.
Rj.