From time to time in my husband and my journey through his Alzheimer's disease, I've hit a "turning point". Today was one. I'm not sure why I'm writing this; just feel I need to tell someone.
For the past week and a half I've been struggling with what could be a serious medical situation. I have epilepsy and I had either a severe seizure or a stroke. I've seen my primary doctor who sent me to my neurologist who ordered tests and sent me back to my primary doctor. I am going through tests now to rule out the conditions that could have caused a stroke. I'm not so much worried about that; what is is and I'll deal with it.
Today I had a brain MRI and an MRA of my neck to see if there are signs of bleeding or clotting. Although it certainly isn't my choice of a way to spend an hour or so, it's okay.
What makes me so sad is that I've had to evade my husband's questions about why I didn't come visit him today. He was so disappointed that I didn't come. If I were to tell him what's happening, he would be so upset and worried and would insist (needlessly of course) on coming home so he could accompany me. I think he feels like I just didn't want to see him.
I miss him so much. He would have been terrific support today and through this situation, but instead he feels hurt that I didn't want to see him today. I told him I plan to come over tomorrow, but it's snowing, so I don't know that I'll be able to do that either.
I hate this disease! Thanks for listening.