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I have a close, close friend with ALS how can I help him? I cannot be part of his care and even get information about how he is doing. I feel like I have lost a part of my heart not knowing how he is. Has anyone else faced this problem.
It is always devastating to hear of a diagnosis of ALS. People respond differently when they hear they have it...some folks become strong advocates and others retreat into a place where they try to feel safe and isolated.
As for what you can do, just send him a note expressing your feelings. Participate in a local ALS walk in his honor. Raise funds for research and awareness. Light a candle for him in church if it is consistent with your faith.
If you are able and your friend allows you to help, you can do some shopping for him, mow his lawn, help pay some bills, etc. You can help him locate needed technologies that will improve his quality of life as the disease progresses.
There are many ways to help - some of which you can do without him even knowing. Be creative and just love him.
He is lucky to have a friend that cares. It happens sometimes that friends cannot deal with such a devastating illness and they distance themselves.
Stay strong and send love. Let him know you will be with him as much or as little as he needs.
I hope this helps a wee bit.
I think the best thing you can do is to just be there for him. Call ofteen and see if he needs anything, stop by and offer help or just to visit. Learn all you can about this dreadful disease. Your friend may be in depression or denile. He is going to face some big changes in his life- just be there . Some time he may not want to visit but go back again and again. Cale did not want visitors (to much pride) but once they were there he was so happy. Life can be hard. Life with ALS is real hard. OFFER HELP TO HIS CREGIVERS TOO. They will need all the help offered. A lot of people just seem to fade away once PALS are diagnosed . They say they want to remember their friends "as they were". This is hard for everyone and we need all the friends and family to be there. Bless you.
All of the above, plus, if he is being cared for by unpaid family or friends, try to do something for the caregivers. They get really exhausted, and people don't usually remember to ask how THEY are doing. A card to the caregiver or an offer to sit with the PALS so they can take a nap, goes a long way.
Sincerely,
Barb
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