I think a great thing is to admit when you cannot do it alone. In this process while Mason was sick and throughout my life experiences I have been fortunate to use the resources of professionals to help me process what is happening. When Mason was sick, we used the child life people to help us with the kids, and got a play therapist for our other son to help deal with everything. My husband and I used different methods. He talked with his friends and I reached out to those in the hospital that were the professionals when I was at a breaking point. Our family has also gone to counseling after Mason died because you have to get used to the new family dynamic and living with grieving people that grieve in very different ways.
I think the challenge is cost. Even with good insurance, mental health services are not covered very well and many do not take insurance anymore. So we have gone to therapists but in short spurts, to hash out what was needed and then tried to manage on our own. For those without good resources, use what the hospital has, the doctor's office, or your local cancer society's or other non-profit organizations to reach out. That is why I think online stuff is so awesome. It is not a replacement for professional resources but can be a supplement and boost you need when you can't get there or a bridge till you go the next time..
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the power of professional help
- By dleach
- Posted June 3, 2009 at 10:28 am · 5 replies
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- By Gala
- Posted June 3, 2009 at 12:10 pm
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Now living alone in Spain where we came to live 7 years ago for the climate and Andrew's health, which sadly he lost the fight for only 3 months ago, I desperately sought counselling or others in similar situations. Not only am I in a foreign country (we are English) but live in a fairly remote part away from tourism, and if there were any such facilities it would of course be in Spanish, which I do speak, but not as far as a counselling session is concerned. Then, I found this wonderful sight and without a doubt it has saved me from many a bad day., Just to know the experiences of others and to realise you are not alone in your grief has been a godsend. All of you are my counsellors every day and its free, THANK YOU
- By Gala
- Posted June 3, 2009 at 12:10 pm
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Now living alone in Spain where we came to live 7 years ago for the climate and Andrew's health, which sadly he lost the fight for only 3 months ago, I desperately sought counselling or others in similar situations. Not only am I in a foreign country (we are English) but live in a fairly remote part away from tourism, and if there were any such facilities it would of course be in Spanish, which I do speak, but not as far as a counselling session is concerned. Then, I found this wonderful sight and without a doubt it has saved me from many a bad day., Just to know the experiences of others and to realise you are not alone in your grief has been a godsend. All of you are my counsellors every day and its free, THANK YOU
- By katelynn
- Posted June 3, 2009 at 12:12 pm
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I absolutely agree. Help is important, though it's hard to ask for help sometimes.
I'm sorry about your son. My little brother died of cancer 7 years ago when he was 14 yrs old. It's very sad to lose someone so young.
Sounds like you help a lot of people yourself - that's wonderful:)
- By Lindakaylkw101
- Posted June 4, 2009 at 8:36 am
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Reach out to an area church that might have a christian counseling counselor with a sliding scale, they really are wonderful.
Linda
- By iva1
- Posted June 5, 2009 at 7:55 am
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I am the so called WELL/Spouse, livingwith terrific daughter for 4 years while husbands conditions worsen. My problem is a wel known one - RELEASING INDEPENDENCE when I have been a L/eader and love being a doer, for all of my 86 years,,I havwe thought we were ding easonably well but our daughter thinks we need a third person to observe our present life style and if we need more changes in the physical household Where tdo we find this help?
Really appreciate dleach's helps and greive with you in your loss - for Mateo and Mason's daddy as well.
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