Join now

Already a member? Sign in

Welcome to Inspire!

What - Inspire is a place where you can connect with people who share your health concerns and find information and advice in groups sponsored by organizations you know and trust.

Why - As a member you can use Inspire to let friends and family know how you're doing, contact others who share your health concerns, receive personalized updates and information about participating in surveys and clinical trials, and more.

How - Joining Inspire is completely free and usually takes less than a minute. Join now!

corner corner corner

My mom 2/26/08 :(

Monica65
  • By Monica65
  • Posted March 30, 2008 at 9:01 pm · 16 replies
  • Shared with the public
1 Recommendation

My mom died a month after being diagnosed with terminal lung/bone cancer. She was 61 years old. I'm still in SHOCK! She got into a fender minor frnder bender in Sept 2007.

She was complaining of leg and back pain after a few weeks. Finally had a body scan they saw a fractured lumbar. Ok.. we know why she is in pain.

On the day of the appt to fix her lumbar they ran more tests and BOOM they found BONE CANCER!! Doing more tests- they found stage 4 lung cancer! From a fractured lower lumbar to TERMINAL CANCER was and still is SHOCKING.

My mom was my best friend her name was Judi. Dr's told us up to 6 months well she died a MONTH after being diagnosed.

I still have words for what happened to my mom. The pain from the fractured lumbar prevented her from finished radiation. The cancer was eating at her skull and left a whole there. She was getting lesions on her skin. The cancer ate her ALIVE! And there was nothing we can do.

Explore topics in this journal entry and replies:

Cancer Surgery Osteosarcoma Arthritis Back pain Kidney stones Morphine Pneumonia Pain Bone cancer Lung cancer

16 replies

CHammett

Hi, Monica.

I am so sorry for your loss. I cannot imagine how painful it must have been to lose your mother so quickly with no time to adjust. My condolences to you and your family.

Carole
NSCLC IIIB

Monica65

Thank you. It's one of those bad nights were i can't stop crying

2mmama

WOW........I don't have words except Im am so sorry for your loss. I too am loosing my mom slowly and I fear what you are going through. I don't know you personally but we are conected by this wicked disease and I am only an email away!!

Blessings!
Christi

LeahC

I am so sorry for what you are going through. It's not fair. It's not right. My mother has SCLC-ED, I know the moments I have with her now, will have to last a lifetime. It's makes me want to curl up and die myself. I wish I knew how to make you feel better, but I know what you have gone through. I pray your mother finds a special place to live in your heart and her memories will light your way when the path gets dark.

pattyp1

Monica,
I am so sorry for your loss. My dad passed on 1/22 - we had 151 days with him after his diagnosis - and it still wasn't enough. My only consolation is that I believe he is happy and healthy now in heaven...and without any side effects....
I send big hugs to you.
Pat

Angie-in-SC

Monica,
I am so terribly sorry for you loss. I often has nights like that. I lost my precious Mama, Judy also, in April of last year. We found out that her pneumonia symptoms was small cell lung cancer after several months of no improvement from antibiotics and such. I was pregnant with my second little girl at the time. Mama was everything to me, my best friend. We lost her after a horrible, but brave 6 month battle. Lauren was only 3 months old and Carolann wasn't quite 3. It breaks my heart that she won't be here to see her only two granddaughters grow up. I know, however, that she is still with us and watching over my girls. Know that I also feel your pain. I truly do. I'm here for you.
with a big hug,
Angie

Monica65

Thanks everyone. The hardest part was since she was in pain because of her fractured lower back they doped her up to the freaking point were she was inchorient since the day she died!! I argued with stepfather they are giving her too many meds! To make a long story short... she had Hypercalcemia. Which made her delusional it was horrible! I know there are things that was happening with her to be so incoherent and delusional and whimpering etc.. I will be getting her medical records and LAB work to see if she had bloood test everyday. She walked in the hospital with a walker and her mind she came out of the hospital with out her mind and not walking!

Yea... there's a problem there somewhere. I will be contacting attorneys

I don't know if you believe in life after death. My mom and I did. I have had many readings since she past with mediums. 2x she told me in detail about what went wrong in the hospital and that the nurses where sloppy and certain thing were NOT correct.

I never had a conversation with my mom since she went into the hospital without her being delusional. Her last month on this earth she had no mind and couldn't enjoy my mom like the way she was

Nola

Monica, I feel for you because I also lost my mom to spine cancer 3 months after diagnosis. The ass of a doctor kept booking her into hospital for kidney infections! She was a fine lady, like Judi was too I'm sure, and a darn good friend. You will have many more tearful days, but time really does heal. My mom's been gone 10 years now and I think of the good times, not when she was drugged on morphine and peeing in a nappy (sorry, South African terminology! You call it a diaper).

deciccork1

Monica,
I am so sorry for your loss. I also lost my mom in 1997. I miss her so much! She had colon cancer. I remember the bad times but pushed them out to remember the good. She was my best friend (next to my husband). Now I am seeing my husband with stage 4 lung that met to his brain.....He is only 52. Please do not loose your faith.
Prayers fro my house to yours,
Roxanne(Rox)

Monica65

Thanks Roxanne. My prayers go out to you and your husband. Stage 4 with any cancer is a horrible thing for anyone to go through and watch a loved one die.

I prayed at times to just take my mom because she was so delusional and mumbling and in so much pain when they needed to turn her. I wanted her pain to be gone but, then again i wanted her here with me. I told her i am being selfish because, i love you too much to let you go. Of course she didn't hear me.

There are no easy words when someone has been struck with a terminall illness.

Blessings to you family

PeaNute8

Monica,
I'm soooooooooooooooooo very sorry to hear about your mom and what she went through. My best friend Amy died 4 years ago from Osteosarcoma in her left leg. She has lots of pain with that. It was so very hard to watch her suffer. I'm just thankful she is not in that much pain any more. She is missed every day. I hear music on the radio and think of her or something (anything) makes me think of her. I have never understand why nice people get this terrable crap. I'm thinking of you and your family.

Thinking of you, Tina:)

Monica65

I just want to thank everyone here who has replied. I'm happy to have found a place where people care.

Tina my mom had pain in her leg on and off for years and nobody found anything. So, we chalked it up to arthritis. After the fender bender her back leg and hip hurt. After the 6th radiation we found out that the cancer ate her hip bone. She had no hip BONE anymore!!! Between that and the whole in her skull. It was too much to handle mentally.

The hospital i will be looking to.. had her so damn medicated that she never got out of bed for 12 days so, she lost any kind of mobility and that also killed her. In her delusional state she would my sister and I that, she will getting out of bed to walk. My sister and i looked at each and i started crying.

The emotional toll was too hard to bear anymore. There is so much more about her delusional mind that it's too hard to even explain. Most of it had to do with her HIGH HIGH calcium in her blood from the bone cancer and fracture.

christine285

Ohh monica i feel for you.
My dad 65 was just diagnosed with Lung Cancer that spread to the bone, wow your story just bumbed me out..... He had back pain (we thought kidney stones) and like your mom one test lead to another and boooom lung cancer with metastasis. How come she passed so quickly?

Monica65

WE HAVE NO IDEA! why she passed so fast! All the pain was coming from her fractured lower back from a fender bender months earlier. She had no pain b4 that in her back at all. There was a lesion where her fracture was. The pain from doing testing for a week killed her back. If it wasn't for the fracture. I can almost guarantee she would be here today. It wasn't the cancer pain it was her fracture.

She had terminal cancer. It had spread like wildfire through her body very very quickly! She lived a normal life b4 the accident. That fracture i think made the cancer spread. She was getting lesions on the outside of her skin, she had a HUGE "soft tissue" lump in the back of her head and the bonce cancer was eating her skull!

So, from living a normal life b4 the accident to dying so quickly is hard to handle. It really is hard to make sense out of all this

tduzan

Monica, I am so sorry for your loss. I just found your link and it touched me to know someone else is in my shoes. It's difficult when you are so young yourself, to lose your mother, who is also "too young."

I have been fortunate that my mother has made it 8 months since being diagnosed, but watching her decline everyday and seeing how much she struggles is the most difficult thing I've ever had to watch. I, like you did, sometimes pray that she would just pass quickly and peacefully, but my selfishness doesn't want to let go of her. I am constantly torn between the two.

My mothers cancer was discovered when she went to the doctor to have gall bladder surgery. She was healthy and active before, and from that day on, she hasn't been able to work or have any kind of life at all.

Please know that I'll be praying for you. Please feel free to add me as a friend and keep in touch.

sutton1626

Hello,
I'm so sorry to hear your story. My brother was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer on 7/28 and passed away on 9/4. He went into the hospital a week after he was diagnosed , for pain management. He stayed there for a month, then went home for just over a week before he passed. His symptoms were sinus infections, pain in the shoulder , pelvis and spine. Had been going to Orthopedic surgeons, and other doctors and no one suspected cancer? How can that be? He was seeing doctors regularly for over a year trying to figure out why he was in so much pain, and still no one diagnosed it. No one even took a chest xray until it was way too late. None of it makes sense to me.

Add to the discussion

Don't have an Inspire account? Join now!

Forgot password?

You