I destroyed my New years resolution last night, by going to the hospital. I suppose it was a silly resolution to begin with, as none of us (with exception to Munchausen patients) ever actually WANT to make a habit out of it. really it was a resolution of hope rather than determination. And I still think I'm doing better, since my last hospital visit was last July. 10 months is a record since being diagnosed.
I have known I was flaring for a while. But yesterday was undoubtedly the most painful day of my life. I saw my GI yesterday morning, and told her I was starting to feel sick, but at that point it was mild. She took some bloodwork, presribed some new meds, and sent me on my way. I don't know why I go into each appoinment thinking I will leave with a "cure" or feasible solution, seeing as there really is none in regards to motility disorders, but each time I feel discouraged and subdued when I leave the office with another round of "i wish there was something else we could do"
I went back to work, as the pain steadily progressed to out of control. I tried to be as quiet as possible about it but I couldn't think straight, and ran from the lab without taking off my lab equipment, nearly collpasing in the bathroom. Our head boss found me there, brought me a privacy room, and gave me some tea. I started running a high fever and was shaking. I really wanted to wait it out, because I hate the ER, so I tried to work some more but finally knew I was in need of medical attention. My wonderful husband left work and brought me there.
It took three pushes of dilaudid and a fourth one 30 minutes later to ease the pain into a more tolerable state. I had a CT scan, fluids, and a "GI cocktail" placed into my IV to displace a gastric outlet obstruction.
I missed my workout yesterday, and felt guilty! I even asked (hey I was on potent narcotics) what the sugar content of the IV contrast was. The nurse gave me a concerned look (probably for my sanity) and left the room. Now if that isn't dedication to bodybuilding, NOTHING is!!!
I also found out I am lactose intolerant, but to continue with the trend that my body is far from textbook....consuming lactose makes me feel better!... In a "normal" lactose intolerant person, the sugar draws in extra water to the small bowel, causing cramps and loose stools. For me? The extra water causes things to move more through my slugglish small intestine.
6 weeks ago I gave up dairy because in bodybuilding, lactose causes something called subcutaneous water retention, which prevents the muscles from being fully visible beneath the skin. Around the same time that I did that, I started to flare.
so I'm a lactose intolerant girl who needs dairy to feel better. How's that for Irony?
I am back at work today, on dilaudid but elsewise getting back to at least what is my "normal". all in all, it's not a big setback. and at least I won't feel much pain during my workout at the gym today! :)
Add to the discussion